IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In some countries it is illegal to reject an applicant based on his or her age. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this approach.

#countries #applicant #age #approach
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In a number of ,nations it is unethical to deny an employee focus on his or her age. In the following ,paragraphs I would discuss both profits and drawbacks of
this
Linking Words
 statement.
To begin
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 with, nowadays
youngsters
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 have great knowledge about technology and the latest machines and software but old
people
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 have a scarcity of techno information. That's the reason why employers mostly selected
youngsters
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 because they do not want to spend money to train old
people
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 and one of the major drawbacks of old
people
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 is they feel exhausted after doing only one or two hours of
work
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although
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 ,they have a good amount of experience .
However
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 old
people
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 take too many leaves from the job ,they feel exhausted more than
youngsters
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due to
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 weakness and hard
work
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while
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 doing the job tend to sick them.
Additionally
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, employers have one big profit
while
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 they give jobs
youngsters
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 they would
work
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 hard and energetically even though, they do not take to many holidays during the
work
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 period. But
youngsters
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 alter their jobs often
however
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 older
people
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 can not.
Hence
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,
youngsters
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work
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 hard, do not take too many leaves
as well as
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 energetic but they often change jobs.
To conclude
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,both young
people
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 and older have downsides and profits during the job.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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