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The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#information #individuals #internet #companies #organisations #outweigh
Companies and Organisations related to the
internet
 hold the population's personal
information
 in their databases. For some it contributes excellent life for human beings and others disagree with
this
. It is to acknowledge that the modern digital world has been more convenient with appearing the
internet
 and computers.
People
 can access any
information
 or knowledge on Google engine in a short time and
also
this
 development provides magnitude opportunities for being well educated and breaking all problems without going anywhere. In ,addition
internet
 changed
people
's lifestyles as an example of e-commerce and
people
 can send money on the
internet
 to any country in the world without going anywhere.
Furthermore
 for being an
internet
 user and conducting the processes listed above you need to include your personal
information
such
 as birth date, family name and so on. In the world human beings who use the
internet
 their all
information
 is contained in company centres,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 sometimes
this
 flashes some problems.
Information
 in a Database could be hacked and used for fraudulent activities
for instance
 it can be conflicting
an
Change preposition
with an
show examples
 individual's bank account and
accessing
Wrong verb form
access
show examples
people
's
information
 for illegal processes. In ,summary
internet
 provides both pluses and minuses and it depends on what
people
 use it for. If
internet
 users would operate it for positive purposes it could be more beneficial for our living. In my ,opinion
Internet
 has more benefits
Submitted by turka2689 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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