IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Should long-term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they give something back to the community?

#job #seekers #receipt #government #work #community
To begin
 with, long-term
government
employees
 have numerous
benefits
, and with all the
benefits
 and power in ,hand they definitely have to contribute towards society. Not only
employees
, but people who are seeking jobs can
also
 do community service.
This
 essay will cover the situation with respect to both aspects. The
employees
 who are
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
part of
government
 organisations enjoy a large number of
benefits
 from their organisations.
For instance
, there is an employee who has been working in the administrative wing of the
government
. His
allowances
 include free railway transportation, fuel
allowances
, and health
allowances
, and the
government
 itself provides a vehicle for both personal and professional usage. Apart from all these
allowances
, they will receive a high amount of salary. As a part of receiving these fruitful
benefits
, the employee can spend a part of his earnings on the community as a charity. There are only a few people who spend their earnings by giving it back to society. Not only by contributing money, but they can
also
 give back by providing free education to students up to secondary school.
Similarly
, the universities which are run by the state can provide their students with stipends or scholarships. These factors help the upcoming generations to
also
 become generous and would want to contribute back when they are earning. I admit the fact that the
employees
 enjoy
such
 comfort of the
allowances
 are taken from their own share of salary.
However
, in most ,cases the
benefits
 they avail are much higher than the deductions.
Therefore
, I conclude by emphasising that as a responsible citizen, it is important for any permanent job seeker to show some social responsibility by doing some volunteer work during his productive period.
Submitted by Vaishnavi Dasari on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: