Some people think that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decision about matters that affect them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #choices #matters #food #clothes #entertainment #society #individuals #decision

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There are many important topics that most countries are faced with, unemployment especially for

school-leavers

Correct your spelling

school leavers

show examples

is the biggest one. Analyzing

this

Linking Words

problem could show some of its effects on

people

Use synonyms

who mentioned,

limited

Correct word choice

that limited

show examples

job offers and not enough income are great examples. I will explain my statement and other challenges that may young

people

Use synonyms

face in the essay. Joblessness is a major challenge for school leavers, who are forced to leave school or

they did

Wrong verb form

show examples

it with their own desire. Poverty could be a good reason for leaving school and giving up higher education.

This

Linking Words

even m affects their self-esteem and does not

dare

Verb problem

prevent

show examples

them

Change preposition

from to

show examples

continue

Verb problem

apply

show examples

studying after all. The

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

that may use these

people

Use synonyms

are usually hard with a bad salary in advance.

This

Linking Words

might ruin their chance to continue their education.

Although

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

's desire and passion to study is a great reason, chances and way of living

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

important for them as well. In today's world, many distractions exist that make young

people

Use synonyms

distracted and hopeless.

This

Linking Words

may change their lives and depress them. Younger who do not have a purpose in their lives and see everything as pointless. Lack of energy and physical activities are the other things that might have impacts on their mental health. In conclusion, unemployment is a really great challenge that countries should be worrying about. It is true that many challenges are important too, but

this

Linking Words

could be the priority. The mental and physical health of youngsters should be

concerned

Verb problem

considered

show examples

as well.

Submitted by shojaeinejad_m on Wed May 03 2023

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

252 words

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Should animals be used in testing new drugs and procedures?

(Livia) Your manager has asked you to arrange a party for a colleague who is leaving the company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter – Suggest a suitable date and time for the party – Recommend a venue – Propose the food and entertainment options that should be available.

In some countries, students studying in university live with their family, whereas in other countries, students choose to study in another city. Do you think the advantages of living away from homes while studying outweigh the disadvantages?

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing.What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

The movement of people from agricultural areas to big cities caused problems im both palces. In your oponion, what is the reason for this problem? How can it be solved?