IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Video records are better to learn about the way other people in the world lives than written documents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In today's globalized world, learning about other
cultures
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 has become increasingly important.
While
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 some
people
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 argue that written
documents
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 are a better way to learn about different ways of life, I completely agree with the notion that
video
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records
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 are a more effective medium.
Firstly
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,
video
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records
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 can convey a great deal of information and detail in a relatively short amount of time.
For example
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, watching a documentary film about a particular
culture
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 provides viewers with a deeper and more comprehensive understanding of the
culture
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, as they can observe how
people
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 dress, eat, communicate, and engage in other daily activities.
This
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 level of detail and richness cannot be achieved through written
documents
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, which are limited in their ability to describe the nuances of a
culture
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.
Secondly
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,
video
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records
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 offer a more engaging and immersive learning experience than written
documents
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. Videos allow viewers to see and hear the cultural practices being performed, which can help them understand the context, significance, and emotional impact of those practices.
This
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 level of engagement can be crucial in fostering empathy and appreciation for different
cultures
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, which is especially important in today's interconnected world.
Finally
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,
video
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records
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 can offer a more accurate and authentic representation of
a
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apply
show examples
culture
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 than written
documents
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. Written
documents
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 are subject to bias and interpretation, and they may not accurately reflect the lived experiences of the
people
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 being described.
In contrast
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,
video
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records
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 can provide a more objective and authentic view of a
culture
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, as they capture the actual
behavior
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behaviour
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, language, and customs of the
people
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 being filmed. In conclusion,
video
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records
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 are a superior medium for learning about other
cultures
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 compared to written
documents
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. They offer a more detailed, engaging, and authentic representation of different ways of life, and they can foster a deeper appreciation and understanding of other
cultures
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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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