children aree facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and waht measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

Recently, there has been growing concern about the stress from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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children
due to
the higher level of competition in different dimensions, and it is able to lead to severe mental illness. Some people agree that there are a number of factors causing the pressure on
children
such
as education and parental expectation.
Therefore
,
this
essay will identify two reasons and solutions for the issues.
Initially
, the stress in young people in
this
generation, especially high school students, has emerged from the more competition in education. In fact, the situation is intensified by the overpopulation crisis which influences the oversupply of human labour. At
this
point, parents have to put tension on their child's academic success to prevent them from unemployment in the future.
In addition
, globalization does
has
Wrong verb form
have
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an impact on
children
. As the information is increasingly accessible, they are able to view the young
millennials
Change noun form
millennials'
millennial's
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lifestyles that could inspire their life to be like that person.
On the contrary
, there are two solutions for
this
problem, the strain on the new generation. The first one is the intervention of
government
through policy. The
government
has to understand the
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
and innovate the proper activities to reduce their stress
as well as
progress their future skills. For example, the medical volunteering program in rural areas for young adults allows them to change their perspectives towards the world and able to learn about the career they are looking for. Concurrently, the
government
can support
the
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graduates in terms of job-seeking programs. As many first jobber encounters unemployed, the
government
could build a non-profit organization to match the labour with the company
that is
recruiting. These two methods could reduce the fear of unemployment after graduation. All in all, the paper has examined the causes and solutions of the burden on students
due to
the higher competition in society. In my perspective, the concern will have a higher impact on not only
a
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children
but the future world as they will become adults. If the
government
still ignore them, it will
consequently
influence the more severe problems for other dimensions
such
as society, business and education as a chain.
Submitted by nuntitapr on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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