In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
In today’s globalized world, supermarkets often stock a variety of foods sourced from countries across the globe.
This
essay argues that the development of the Linking Words
market
system is a beneficial thing for people to fulfil their needs and satisfaction related to food.
One significant impact Use synonyms
for
either exporting or importing cuisine from or to other regions is the enrichment of nutrition sources that are different from local Change preposition
of
agriculture
produce. Replace the word
agricultural
This
movement Linking Words
also
opens the accessibility of Linking Words
market
sharing that leads to promoting the cultural identity of each country. Use synonyms
For instance
, Indonesia has one of the famous ingredient food called tempe/tempeh which comes from fermented soybeans. Linking Words
This
food contains not only macronutrients Linking Words
such
as protein but Linking Words
also
a lot of other micronutrients that Linking Words
Add a missing verb
are beneficially
beneficially
Change the word
beneficial
good
for health. The government can help the soybean farmer not only to overcome their financial struggles by supporting them to mass-produce and export the product but Correct word choice
apply
also
improve the national capital through the activities. Linking Words
On the other hand
, South Korea has a traditional cuisine namely Kimchi which is made from fermented vegetables that are Linking Words
also
rich in flavour and nutrients that other people from abroad can buy easily through their supermarket.
Linking Words
However
, exporting or importing can face a negative impact if the policymakers cannot supervise and control in a good way.
Linking Words
For example
, in Indonesia, if the government does not support the farmer with a good of production material Linking Words
then
they cannot produce the tempe and it will ruin the demand in the Linking Words
market
.
In conclusion, I personally agree that these Use synonyms
market
Use synonyms
development
bring many benefits to consumers and governments even though there is Fix the agreement mistake
developments
also
a potential risk Linking Words
to have
a negative impact.Change preposition
of having
Submitted by rhisaaidilla on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure the essay stays on topic and addresses all parts of the task effectively. The essay highlights both positive and negative aspects of global food trade, which is great, but include a few more points to substantiate your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Work on the logical flow of ideas, ensuring each paragraph logically leads to the next. The essay occasionally jumps between ideas without clear connections.
coherence and cohesion
Strengthen connections between sentences and paragraphs to enhance cohesion. Use more linking words and phrases to guide the reader smoothly through your arguments.
introduction/conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, outlining the topic and summarizing the stance taken.
relevant examples
Relevant examples from Indonesia and South Korea are effectively used to illustrate points, showing a good understanding of the topic.
supported main points
The essay provides a thoughtful analysis of the positive impacts of global food trade, such as increasing nutritional diversity and promoting cultural identity.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.