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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #governments #ban #sports #freedom #activity
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Some communities argue that lawmakers should abolish physical exercise that poses a danger to the health of the individual.
While
Linking Words
 others believe that the population should feel free and enjoy any athletics of their choice . I personally believe that government officials should disallow
such
Linking Words
 sporting activities.
Firstly
Linking Words
, lawmakers should forbid athletics that endanger the lives of
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 because it serves as
Add an article
a
show examples
life
Use synonyms
-threatening event.
For instance
Linking Words
, the public who indulge in sporting
life
Use synonyms
 like wrestling put their
life
Use synonyms
 on the line to entertain the public . In
this
Linking Words
 type of physical activity, folk jump from unimaginable heights and other forms of abject
such
Linking Words
 as tables, chairs, and ladders among a few are used to inflict pain thereby causing internal bleeding, broken bones and even death may occur if preventable measures are not put in place .
However
Linking Words
, other nations are of the view that individuals should select any physical activity they prefer because they believe that we are in a free world and one of the fundamental human rights of everyone is freedom and the community who indulge in
such
Linking Words
 athletics are financially stable.
For instance
Linking Words
, John Cena is one of the renounced wrestling in the world and he is financially stable. So if
such
Linking Words
 enterprise were to be disallowed he may be a liability to society. In conclusion, some societies argue that athletic movements should be forbidden by government officials since they
life
Use synonyms
 threaten
while
Linking Words
 others believe that they serve as o source of income for athletes. In my opinion, I believe that sports movements that pose a danger to
life
Use synonyms
 should be disallowed.
Submitted by oludayotemilade on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • severe injuries
  • fatalities
  • base jumping
  • bull running
  • extreme skiing
  • safeguard
  • well-being
  • regulating
  • avoidable harm
  • healthcare costs
  • burdening
  • personal freedom
  • autonomy
  • training
  • equipment
  • mitigated
  • personal satisfaction
  • mental health benefits
  • resilience
  • adventure
  • assess risks
  • public safety
  • unnecessary healthcare costs
  • outright bans
  • balanced approach
  • stringent safety standards
  • mandatory training sessions
  • adequately informed
  • safeguarding
  • public health
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