IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Government investment in the arts,such as music and theatre,is a waste of money.Government must invest this money in public services instead.Do u agree or disagree

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In
this
Linking Words
 era,
Use synonyms
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
 finance more on
arts
Use synonyms
 like
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
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 and movies which leads to lavishing of cash.Rather,
Government
Use synonyms
 should fund more
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
public services. I agree that Authorities should spend more on commercial services
instead
Linking Words
 of
arts
Use synonyms
 because it will create job opportunities
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals and
also
Linking Words
 promote life and
brin g
Correct your spelling
bring
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 development to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society at large. These points will
Linking Words
further
Add a missing verb
be further
show examples
 explained with
releveant
Correct your spelling
relevant
 examples and draw
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
logical
Add an article
a logical
show examples
conclusion
Fix the agreement mistake
conclusions
show examples
 in the subsequent paragraphs. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand,
Government
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 should channel more
money
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on
Change preposition
into
show examples
infrastructures
Fix the agreement mistake
infrastructure
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,
Correct article usage
the refubirshment
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refubirshment
Correct your spelling
refurbishment
 of markets,
companies
Correct word choice
and companies
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 than engaging much
money
Use synonyms
 in
entertainment
Correct article usage
the entertainment
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industries
Fix the agreement mistake
industry
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.
For example
Linking Words
,my colleague in the office who live in
rural
Correct article usage
a rural
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 area testifies how he makes
daily
Add an article
a daily
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 profit through the sales he made after work because Authorities built and funded much
money
Use synonyms
 in
market
Correct article usage
the market
show examples
 sector where individual exchange and buy goods and
also
Linking Words
 built companies where people work and make
money
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 will
inturn
Correct your spelling
in turn
show examples
creates
Correct subject-verb agreement
create
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 job opportunities in their communities.
On the other hand
Linking Words
.funding more cash on
Use synonyms
arts
Change the noun form
art
show examples
 galleries
such
Linking Words
 as music and films are waste of resources because people will not benefit anything useful from it. I believe that capitalizing and financing much cash on
construction
Add an article
the construction
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 of hospitals,
building
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the building
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 of schools,electricities,
supply
Correct word choice
and supply
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 of clean water will be more beneficial to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society .
For example
Linking Words
,in my
town
Add a comma
,town
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 people travel to
distance
Replace the word
distant
show examples
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
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inorder
Correct your spelling
in order
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 to assess health
facility
Fix the agreement mistake
facilities
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,schools and so
no
Correct your spelling
on
show examples
 but when
Authorities
Correct article usage
the Authorities
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 map out to build all these facilities(universities,health care centres etc)folks now live a quality life and the town became developed. In conclusion,
Government
Use synonyms
 should engage and fund more on things that
promotes
Change the verb form
promote
show examples
 employment and
also
Linking Words
 establish
individuals
Fix the agreement mistake
individual
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enviroment
Correct your spelling
environments
 for quality life living rather than spending extravagantly on
arts
Use synonyms
.

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Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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