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Writing Samples
Band 5

Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic,social and commercial perspectives. What are the courses of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressure.

#children #pressures #perspectives #courses #measures #pressure
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It is commonly said that
more
Change preposition
in more
show examples
 countries
parents
Use synonyms
 are giving more attention to minors around the world.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 they are coming across to more issues.
Such
Linking Words
 as, some
children
Use synonyms
 are being pressurize
under
Change preposition
into
show examples
educational
Replace the word
education
show examples
,general and promotion.
This
Linking Words
 essay intends to analyze the causes of these issues and suggest some measures to
altuiate
Correct your spelling
alleviate
 the problems. There are many educational compression on infants by their
parents
Use synonyms
 or dears. Today's minor is extremely weak
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 competing with another country's junior in terms of knowledge.
To
Change preposition
For
show examples
this
Linking Words
 reason, their
parents
Use synonyms
 want to
more
Add a missing verb
do more
show examples
 things
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 them. That's why, they sent their kids to the best schools and private coaching centres in town, where the school suitcase is frequently heavier
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
minor
Correct article usage
the minor
show examples
 himself. They have extra special preparation for their study after school hours. They don't have enough time
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 set off their secret facilities. There
many
Add a missing verb
are many
show examples
 community and advertisement weights. Youngsters of today's period are in a large quandary. They would like modern society,
while
Linking Words
 their
parents
Use synonyms
 hope
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to commit to the old conventions.
Such
Linking Words
 resistance
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
children
Use synonyms
. They come across more
stresses
Fix the agreement mistake
stress
show examples
 among their peers, which can be well if their
equallies
Correct your spelling
equally
, and worse if their
coequalies
Correct your spelling
coequality
 are not penalized. Some
children
Use synonyms
 have the most essential technologies.
Such
Linking Words
 as, they catch sight of the latest models of
iphones
Correct your spelling
phones
iPhones
 on their peers and desire to purchase them. When they don't afford to get them,they get stressed. Resolutions to these drawbacks are not easy.
Parents
Use synonyms
 are seemly which is the results they expect from their
children
Use synonyms
. For
this
Linking Words
, they should give enough time to their toddlers. They should organize a lot of contests
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to bring out their talents and skills in the school and when
children
Use synonyms
 win or lose, they must admit defeat or victory. To summarize, juniors are under tremendous pressure these days.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 steps should be taken on a battle foundation to keep safe their ingenue youth.
Otherwise
Linking Words
,
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 thrusts will suppress
Correct article usage
the corpolar
show examples
corpolar
Correct your spelling
corollary
 and mental development of juniors.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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