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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

People have different ways of escaping stress and difficult modern life. Some read, some exercise and other work in their garden . What are the reasons for stress? What are the best way of reducing stress?

#people #stress #life #read #exercise #work #garden
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Recently, there are a lot of ways in which people escape from
Use synonyms
stress
Correct article usage
the stress
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 and hurdles of
modern
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the modern
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 world,
stress
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 is becoming alarming and the
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
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the whole world is becoming stressful, some
over come
Correct your spelling
overcome
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 it by reading, working in their gardening and other means. In
this
Linking Words
 discourse, it is my completion to humbly elucidate upon the cause of
stress
Use synonyms
 and ways of reducing it.
Firstly
Linking Words
, one of the important causes of
stress
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 in the modern world is that the sphere is developing daily and a plethora of development are taking place which are distorting and disturbing the well begin of human beings their psychological and physical health are at high risk.
For instance
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, two months ago when they started the construction of
electronic
Correct article usage
an electronic
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 railway line in my country, several buildings were dismantled and the owner became homeless,
this
Linking Words
 is disturbing to mental health and can lead to
post traumatic
Add a hyphen
post-traumatic
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stress
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 disorder, which can indirectly lead to increase in population of hospital visit making life more stressful.
However
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,
government
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the government
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 should try and use another means in establishing their infrastructure or
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 should provide another house to the affected people.
Furthermore
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,
another
Replace the adjective
other
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 causes of
stress
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 include increasing in age as individual increases in age they are beginning to worry about their health,
how
Correct word choice
and how
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 they are going to become dependent on people or their children all these can lead to
stress
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.
However
Linking Words
, it can be reduced by having a good plan for the future, the government should make good provisions for the elderly, and individuals should live healthy live
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
apply
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at
young
Add an article
a young
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 age. From the
forgoing
Correct your spelling
foregoing
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, it can be deduced that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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life itself is stressful and full of difficulties,
therefore
Linking Words
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
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 and
government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
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 have a vital role to play in order to reduce
stress
Use synonyms
 and deal with life.
Submitted by oludayotemilade on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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