IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

rich countries should aallow jobs for skilled and knowlegeable employers who are from poor coutries. Do you agree or disagree.

#countries #aallow #jobs #knowlegeable #employers #coutries
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Nowadays it is extremely clear there is a deep gap between poor and rich
countries
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.
Hence
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,
this
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 could be demonstrated by the general level of culture, both for hard and soft skills, which could
be define
Change the verb form
be defined
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 as a parameter of a nation's well-being. I believe that rich
states
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 should help
people
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 from the less fortunate ones, mainly starting from assumptions.
First,
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I claim the fact that poor
people
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 should have the same possibilities as individuals from rich
countries
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. Obviously, the road to happiness is quite
hardest
Correct word choice
hard
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 for the first cluster, but,
on the other hand
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, it could be facilitated by opportunities given by those who work in a healthy state. In fact, rich workplaces should hire employers from poor
states
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 to share a part of wellness and third-world
countries
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' prosperity.
As a result
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,
this
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 choice could stimulate other
countries
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 to adopt the same strategy and stimulate all the
states
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 to reduce the inferiority of poor ones as well.
Furthermore
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, rich
countries
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 should recruit able workers from poor
states
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 to incentivise studies in these
countries
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.
Therefore
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,
people
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 who move to first-world
states
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 should be considered a master of their co-nationals and an example to follow. In poor minds, these
people
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 have had courage enough to move from their birthplace and change their conditions.
Consequently
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, they could be imitated to escape from poor conditions and bad education possibilities. In conclusion, in my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
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 rich
states
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 should help
states
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 with more difficulties. In
this
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 way, the gap between the wealthy and the poor will be reduced and
also
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 the
last
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countries
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 will have the possibility to improve global wellness.
Submitted by linda.marchetto on

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task achievement
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