Some people think money is one of the most essential factors in promoting hapinness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

#people #money #factors #hapinness #happiness

It is more than true that money plays an essential role in every person's

life

, it helps them find happiness. From my point of view, individuals cannot remain in a happy environment without money as living becomes quite challenging.

Furthermore

, one can live joyfully by having both peace and excellent health.

To begin

with, having financial stability is important as it eases the burden of everyday tasks,

such

as shopping, cycling and other matters needs. If an individual lacks financial stability, they may have started relying on their family, friends, neighbours and even strangers for financial assistance. It leads them to lose their own way, independence and confidence, which in severe cases,

for instance

, depending on others might be the reason for feeling helplessness and

also

hopelessness, eventually causing them to react out of character.

For example

, a recent article in a European news channel reported about a man who after failing to provide his family with everyday needs, had attempted suicide which underscores the importance of financial stability not only for individuals but

also

for their families. There are,

however

, other aspects that bring great joy and are considered blessings in our

life

Firstly

, health – allows people to overcome any sort of challenges that they may encounter.

Furthermore

, being ill and having any disasters can prevent individuals from living

comfortable

Add an article

a comfortable

show examples

life

. The second might be peace, as even poor society, who are struggling to get rich, can experience happiness if they are in the piece.

For instance

, people who live in quite poor counties around the globe, have less stress and social problems compared with those who live in developed corners of the world.

To sum up

, I strongly believe that having sufficient finances is crucial as it allows living in freedom.

However

, good health and peaceful

life

are

also

essential for our satisfaction. These factors assist us overcome obstacles simply,

while

peace brings enough joy and contentment.

Submitted by mirazizalikulov on Thu May 18 2023

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

320 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think money is one of the most essential factors in promoting hapinness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that all people should stay in full-time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some students take a year off between finishing school and going to university, in order to work or to travel. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

There is a big number of people who wish to live in big cities. Write an essay to an educated reader to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in big cities. Include reasons and any relevant examples to support your answer

The world is changing rapidly, working conditions today are not the same as before and people no longer rely on taking one job for life. Discuss the causes for the changes and give suggestions how people should prepare for work in the future.

In many countries, the number of obese children is increasing rapidly, and many people believe that the government is responsible for this alarming problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?