Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #activities #children’s #development #computer #games

It is widely claimed that outdoor

activities

such

as playing football are better for

children

than playing

computer

games

. I totally agree with the statement, the reasons that supported the idea will be explained in the essay.

To begin

with, doing outdoor

activities

benefits

children

's physical and mental

health

For instance

, when playing football, a child has to run and kick the ball;

this

is considered exercise, helping in relaxation and physical growth.

Consequently

, they have a nice mood and a strong body.

Additionally

, it provides an opportunity to meet new people seeing that most

activities

such

as playing football are group

activities

, which require them to interact and engage with others.

On the other hand

, some believe that playing

computer

games

can help kids create new friends because they encounter other people online.

In addition

, it

also

enhances

children

's ability to English because the game is online which means people from other countries can join each other and the main language that they use to communicate is English.

Therefore

, it is another way to learn a new learn language.

In contrast

, it creates less movement because they just sit in the same place and move only their hands and their fingers.

Moreover

, looking at a screen at the screen for a long time is not good for their eyes.

Hence

, it creates drawbacks to their

health

To conclude

, both help

children

to meet new friends because they talk and participate with others.

However

, playing

games

on the

computer

can have a bad effect on kid

health

while

playing outside develops kids' physical

health

Thus

, these are reasons why outdoor

activities

are more beneficial for

children

’s development than playing

computer

games

Submitted by nuchnapa.anna on Thu May 18 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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17Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Physical development
Overall health
Coordination
Foster
Social skills
Teamwork
Mental well-being
Creativity
Exploration
Strategic thinking
Problem-solving
Hand-eye coordination
Sedentary lifestyles
Social isolation
Moderation
Balanced approach
Detract
Obesity
Poor posture

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Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that it's easier for adults to learn skills (Ex: Computer skills) by themselves. Others think they need the help of a teacher in a classroom. Discuss both views and give your opinion as well.

Some are of the opinion that people are naturally born as good leaders while others feel that leadership skills can be learned.Discusd both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that cultural traditions may be destroyed when they are used as money-making traditions aimed at tourists.Others, however,believe that it is the only way to save these traditions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some believe governments should spend more money on improving roads and highways, while some think money should be spent improving public transportation, such as buses, trains, and subways. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.