Some people think movies should only be for entertainment. Others think that they should also have educational values. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #movies #entertainment #values

Many

people

argue that

movies

do not require educational values and should focus

to create

Change preposition

on creating

show examples

fun only.

While

others argue that the audience should learn something through

movies

. I intend to delve into both views and will present my point.

To begin

with, The advocates of entertainment-based

movies

state that the main goal of watching Films is to get relief from stress

as well as

to distract the mind from the problems of daily life.

People

visit theatres mostly on holidays and they expect to have a happy time.

Moreover

, the makers of cinema spend a lot of money and they want the response of the audience to make a blockbuster film. So, they mostly work on adding action and comedy to entertain the public.

For example

movies

like "Fast and Furious"

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

show examples

based on Action and do not have any academic knowledge. It was a big hit.

On the other hand

, there is a type of audience who wants a meaningful movie with a message for society so that awareness regarding some issues should be created and historical knowledge should be given.

Moreover

, They want more science fiction

movies

to make children interested in science and technology which would make a progressive mindset in children towards studies.

Also

, Making Biopics on successful

people

including their journey from the beginning can motivate so many individuals.

For instance

, the Biopic of

stephen hawking

Correct your spelling

Stephen Hawking

show examples

motivates

people

not to give up even having a disease like him.

To conclude

It is clear that

people

want entertainment from pictures but including a message is essential to reach out to the hearts of every individual and it could be the cherry on the cake.

Submitted by me1090905 on Fri May 19 2023

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task response

Ensure that all parts of the essay directly relate to the essay prompt. Use the introduction to clearly outline the position taken on the topic and ensure that all body paragraphs contribute to the development of the argument.

coherence and cohesion

The essay demonstrates a clear structure and progression of ideas, particularly in the introduction and conclusion. However, there are areas where the connection between ideas could be made clearer, thus enhancing coherence and cohesion.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

278 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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