IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Young people’s ideas and attitudes are different from those of their parents and grandparents. What are the differences? What problems may be caused?

#people’s #attitudes #parents #grandparents #differences
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No doubt , nowadays the way of looking towards the world is totally changed from
past
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the past
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 few years ,
however
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,however
show examples
 the question is what is the difference between
in
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apply
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the ideas and
attitude
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attitudes
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 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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young
children
 from their
parents
 and
grandparents
 . In
this
essay
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,essay
show examples
i
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I
show examples
 will briefly explain the difference and
problems
 which causes in between them . To commence with the first and foremost point that
due to
 advancement of technology school going
children
 can easily
gainthe
Correct your spelling
gain the
gain
 knowledge about various things about different culture and
traditional
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tradition
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 and apply
same
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the same
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 thing in their life . Needless to say ,
children
are study
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are studying
show examples
 in CBSE school and other international schools in which they met with numerous
children
 with different backgrounds and they can
exchanged
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exchange
show examples
 their ideas and through with each other
whereas
 , in
parents
 and
grandparents
time
 ,they just taught in
local
Add an article
a local
the local
show examples
 school with limited resources and in their
time
 the advance Technology is
also
 not introduced in each part of the world .Understandably, they
having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 less knowledge about
new
Add an article
a new
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 gadget which create
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
 difference between them.
Nonetheless
 ,
this
 causes many
problems
 in the relationship
of
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between
show examples
grandparents
,
parents
 and
children
.
Firstly
 , the major issue is that
children
 are unable to share their through and personal
problems
 with their
parents
 with open
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
 as they did not feel comfortable with them . Meanwhile ,
the
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in the
show examples
 current generation, people give more
preferences
Fix the agreement mistake
preference
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 to modern culture and style ,
on the other hand
 ,
parents
 give more priority to their own
culture
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cultural
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 values .
consequently
,the bond between both
of
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apply
show examples
them becomes weak and
children
 start living
separate
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separately
show examples
 from their
parents
 .
Moreover
,
children
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
 give proper
time
 and care to their
grandparents
 as well . In conclusion, I would like to restate that with the development of technology the
grap
Correct your spelling
gap
 between
two
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the two
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 generations become huge which causes multiple
problems
 in their relationship
such
 as,
children
 avoid to stay with their
parents
 and
grandparents
while
,
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apply
show examples
 they spend most of
time
Correct pronoun usage
their time
show examples
 with their agemates .
Submitted by kirandkaur131 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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