IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some feel governments should invest in preserving minority languages, while others feel this is not a good use of resources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (Write 250 words.)

It is considered that most of the nation has its own heritage,
culture
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and culture
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 and the most important is
language
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. I believe that
language
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 is deeply tied to culture and identity,
the
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and the
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 debate over whether governments should allocate funds to preserve minority
languages
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 is ongoing.
While
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 some argue that
this
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 investment is crucial, others believe it is not an efficient use of public resources. On the one hand, those in
favor
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favour
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 of preserving minority
languages
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 presume that
language
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 is a vital part of cultural heritage. When a
language
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 dies, an entire way of thinking, storytelling and living often disappears with it.
For instance
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, many original
inhabitants
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inhabitants'
inhabitant's
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languages
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 contain unique knowledge about local ecosystems
that
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is
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are
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 not found in mainstream science.
In contrast
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, opponents argue that the world is becoming increasingly globalized and resources should be used more effectively on pressing issues
such
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 as healthcare, education and manufacturing. Teaching and maintaining a
language
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 spoken by only a few thousand people may require significant investments. From
this
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 view, it’s more practical to focus on major
languages
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 that provide better opportunities in the global job market. In my opinion, governments should strike a balance.
While
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 not all minority
languages
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 can be saved, especially those under immediate threat, is valuable for maintaining human diversity. In conclusion, both deserve thoughtful support as part of
nation’s
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the nation’s
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 duty.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea. Use linking words to connect your thoughts better.
task response
Try to give more specific examples or data to support your arguments.
task response
Ensure your introduction clearly states your opinion and outlines the main points you will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
In your conclusion, you could restate your opinion more clearly and summarize the key points.
task achievement
You provide a good balance between both sides of the argument, which shows awareness of different perspectives.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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