Nowadays families are not as close as they used to be. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to make families closer?

#families

In today’s world, families aren’t as close as in the past .In

this

essay I will discuss the causes of

this

then

I will move on to give a solution to

this

problem.

To begin

with, there are a lot of reasons why relatives aren’t as close as in the past . First of all , Most people have to work long hours , and often both

parents

are working, so they don’t have much Tim to spend with each other or with their children as they used to .

Secondly

,some people work in distant locations , and they stay connected via video calls

such

as Zoom and WhatApp .

However

,there are drawbacks to

this

situation .

For instance

, kids would lack the physical touch of their

parents

while

staying away from them.

Therefore

, the government should do a salary for the wife to stay at home or

parents

can work a part-time job ,so they won’t be exhausted when they return to the house

as a result

parents

can spend more time with their children . In conclusion, the relationship between a family is sensitive , so members of the family should use the right way .

Submitted by maryamabugela on Sun May 21 2023

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

200 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays families are not as close as they used to be. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to make families closer?

Fully explain your ideas

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Young people spend too much of their free time in shopping malls. This has a negative effect on young people and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Using computers and mobile phones in communication -> negative impact on reading and writing among young people, agree or disagree.

Many people think that to become a successful specialist it's better to choose a career early in life and never changer it later. To what extent do you agree with tis view. support your opinion with relevant examples.

Employers should give their staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to help employees get better at their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?