IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. Others believe that there are health benefits of living in cities. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #lifestyle #countryside #health #cities
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At the present time, it is believed that building a healthy lifestyle is easier in the
countryside
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while
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 others argue that living in
cities
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 can have beneficial effects on health.
Although
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 there are some merits regarding
health
Add an article
the health
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 of dwelling in
cities
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, I personally believe that residing in the
countryside
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 can be more advantageous. On the one hand, there are certain reasons why dwelling in
cities
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 has positive effects on health.
To begin
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 with, advanced medical facilities can be available in
cities
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 at all times.
This
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 means that high-quality medicines and qualified doctors could be ready to treat the patients needing them.
For instance
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, if one has a heart attack, they can be taken to the hospital and be saved at once.
In addition
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, several kinds of sports facilities are
also
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 easily accessible for those living in
cities
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. To illustrate
this
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 point, in big
cities
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such
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 as Ho Chi Minh City or Da Nang, citizens can go to the gym every day to do light exercises, build their muscles or simply keep fit.
As a consequence
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, they may look and feel healthier when living in
cities
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.
On the other hand
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, I am firmly convinced that residing in the
countryside
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 can impact more favourably on one’s lifestyle for them in order to be healthier.
First,
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the atmosphere in rural areas is likely to be fresher than it is in urban ones.
This
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 is mainly because there is generally less smoke emitted from factories and cars which may commonly appear in
cities
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 but rural areas.
Therefore
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, the risk of suffering from prevalent diseases
such
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 as pneumonia or asthma could be reduced or even eliminated.
Second,
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fresh food can
also
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 be a plus point in regard to healthy living in the
countryside
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. The main reason is that residents are possibly able to enjoy home-grown vegetables
as well as
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 free-range meat.
As a result
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,
countryside
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 food may contain no preservatives, which helps one to create a more healthy life from the inside out. In conclusion,
while
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 dwelling in
cities
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 brings decent influences in terms of advanced medical and sports facilities for a healthy life, it is my firm belief that residing in the
countryside
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 has more healthful impacts with reference to fresh air and food.
Submitted by huynhtrucminhthu39 on

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task response
Ensure that all points and examples directly relate to the topic and question. Avoid going off topic or providing unnecessary details.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is a clear and logical progression of ideas. Use cohesive devices such as transition words and pronouns to link ideas and create coherence.
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