IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Last week, you visited a local supermarket and you got saticfactory service. Write a letter to the supermarket manager to thank. In your letter: -introduce yourself; -say why you are satisfield; -say thank you and write about your future visits;

Dear Sir or
madam
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Madam
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, I am writing
this
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 letter to express my gratitude for the service that I received from your supermarket
last
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 Friday. My name is Amy. My husband and I just moved to
this
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 suburb
last
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 month with two cats.
Last
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 Friday, we were planning to have a housewarming party with some of our friends and went to your store to purchase the items for the party. The service provided by your staff left a huge impression on us. First of all, as it was the first time for us to visit your store, it was quite hard for us to find the products that we needed. One of your staff
was
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members was
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 extremely patient and knowledgeable since he could ask our questions patiently and told us where the items were.
In addition
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, the girl who was working at the counter was incredibly polite and helpful. She helped us
to
Verb problem
apply
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create a profile to join your membership, which saved at least forty dollars. The meats and vegetables that we bought were particularly fresh and juicy, which made our party more enjoyable. We definitely will continue buying food and household items from your store in the future.
Finally
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, thank you again for the lovely and
delighted
Replace the word
delightful
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 shopping experience. Yours faithfully, Amy Ng

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structure
Move from one idea to the next by making a new short line or new part. This helps the read more easy.
grammar
Some phrasing has a wrong word. Use 'answer' instead of 'could ask our questions' to show you got the answer you needed.
style
Break long lines into two short ones so each idea sits in its own space.
accuracy
Check small miss and word choice like 'lovely and delighted' so it sounds natural.
tone
Kind tone that thanks the shop and says you will come again.
content
You give real detail and tell what you liked about the staff and the foods.
content
You say you moved here and what you did in the shop, which makes the note feel true.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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