Some people think that arts (such as painting and music) do not improve people's life and, therefore, government should not spend money on it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #arts #music #life #government #money

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Arts

Use synonyms

Change the verb form

are

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used as one of the methods to convey the characteristics of nations, including statues, paintings and buildings.

While

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some criticise

regarding

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apply

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fewer contributions derived from

such

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behaviours, I strongly agree with the necessity of trading in money for the perks of diversity in different countries.

To begin

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with, the opponents question

about

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apply

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the meaning of financially

support

Wrong verb form

supporting

show examples

arts

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activities,

such

Linking Words

as holding music concerts ; building national art

gallaries

Correct your spelling

galleries

; and promoting local iconic images, based on various negative impacts

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local societies.

For example

Linking Words

, the Jazz concert held in Taichung, Taiwan, annually is alleged

for

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deteriorating noise pollution and the increase of waste

due to

Linking Words

a large number of visitors.

On the other hand

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, I am in favour of supporting

arts

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in different aspects, since it leads to various advantages. First of all, paintings could display essential events,

as well as

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elucidate a historical story, which cultivates descendants who know better about history. Take Taiwan

national

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National

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Museum as an example, visitors could learn how ancestors

life

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lived

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their

live

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lives

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in the past.

Secondly

Linking Words

arts

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could enable cities with unique symbols,not only can it spreads their

spiriture

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spiritual

but contributes to an increase of commercial revenues. Take the statue of Merlion in Singapore as an example it conveys the

fareless

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fearless

faceless

careless

spiriture

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spiritual

along with

Linking Words

Correct pronoun usage

its

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, geography feature.

Moreover

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, thousands and millions of tourists are attracted by

such

Linking Words

unique

design

Fix the agreement mistake

designs

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, which

stimulites

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stimulates

local

hospitatily

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hospitality

industry To summarise, it is inevitable that funding

arts

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could

provokes

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provoke

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many disadvantages

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for

show examples

socieities

Correct your spelling

societies

and

local

Correct article usage

the local

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environment.

However

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, I strongly believe that it is crucial for countries

develop

Fix the infinitive

to develop

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arts

Use synonyms

since it could enhance the understanding of a nation, on top of that, attracting more

foreingers aroudn

Correct your spelling

foreigners around

the world and benefit residents.

Submitted by unapoya0916 on Thu May 25 2023

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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Some people think that arts (such as painting and music) do not improve people's life and, therefore, government should not spend money on it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is believed that students at schools and universities can learn better via technology rather than with teachers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, there are a lot of students who commit suicide each year. What are the reasons for this? What are the solutions?

As global trade increase, many goods including those we use in daily basis are produced in another country and have to be transport long distance. Do benefit of this trend outweigh disadvantages?