These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #travel #countries #tourism #development

In the modern world, it is widely known that travelling to another

country

is much easier than it was in the past, thanks to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

well-developed transportation, travellers now can visit various places and explore different cultures.

However

, there are

also

debates about whether the advantages that

this

phenomenon brings outweigh the disadvantages. From my perspective,

although

some countries are suffering from mass visitors, it is still beneficial to them considering a variety of benefits. Some claim that the convenience of travelling to another

country

has brought severe issues to the city’s environment which include air pollution and littering.

Although

it is true to some extent, the argument does not consider the fact that many kinds of pollution can be reduced by establishing new policies or laws. Take Singapore as an example, it

had

Wrong verb form

has

show examples

set several strict laws and zero-tolerance policies in the past few years. Since

then

, citizens and visitors

are

Wrong verb form

have become

show examples

more conscious when they are carrying any garbage with them.

Hence

, the

overall

pollution has decreased and

this

example

also

proved that the disadvantage could be reduced or even eliminated.

On the other hand

, the advantages that easy travelling brings to societies are enormous.

Firstly

, a

country

's financial condition can be improved by the money that tourists have spent.

Also

, it is predictable that they will buy lots of products, tickets and groceries.

However

, having a lot of visitors does not always represent a bad thing,

due to

the highly-developed internet, people can easily send photos and post pictures on social media,

therefore

, those spectacular sights can be promoted and attract more people to visit them.

To conclude

although

some people are trying to reject the notion that the disadvantages that easy travelling has brought outweigh the advantages, it is obvious that they have not noticed that the worry can be solved and the financial and promoting benefits could strongly benefit a

country

Submitted by soumya.krishnamurthy on Thu May 25 2023

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extended

Task Response: The essay effectively addresses the advantages and disadvantages of easy travel and provides a clear opinion. The arguments are well-developed and relevant examples are used to support the opinions.

extended

Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure of the essay is good, with clear introduction and conclusion. The main points are well-supported with relevant examples. However, some sentences could be linked more coherently with stronger transitional phrases for a smoother flow of ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

315 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The world of work is changing so fast that employees cannot depend on having the same job or working conditions. What are the possible causes for the rapid change, and what suggestions could be given for preparing people?

Some believe that we should invent a new language for international communication. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time discus both these views, and give your opinion

some people believe that academic success depends mostly on having a good teacher. others argue that it is the attitude of the student. discuss both views and give your own opinion.