These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays, the masses believe that electronic devices

such

as mobile phones and the internet are extremely significant to the ways they communicate with each other. These issues have advantages and disadvantages. In the following essay, I will present a couple of merits and drawbacks of the issue and whether the benefits exceed its demerits. The first merit is that social media enable communication very quickly for the public through electronic mechanisms.

This

is because people can social messenger anywhere.

For example

, my friend lived remote location with his family so he often felt depressed. One day, he installed social communication because he wanted to see his family. Through a messenger, he sent his picture to his family.

In addition

, he did a video call instantly with his family.

This

hence

, felt happy. Another merit is that mobile phones and the Internet

become

Verb problem

allow us to

show examples

get knowledge quickly and easily. To be specific, citizens can access

clues

easily and watch educational material

such

as news,

blog

Fix the agreement mistake

blogs

show examples

, online

course

Fix the agreement mistake

courses

show examples

and so on. One serious demerit is that many people are likely to hazard invasion of privacy and share individual

clues

. The main cause of open

clues

is that humans are

doing

Verb problem

using

show examples

online platforms. Another drawback is that people are difficult to contact socially for a long time.

For instance

, my friend did not contact class after COVID-19 at school so he can’t meet friends.

However

, he tried to communicate with new friends only online but he

cannot

Wrong verb form

could not

show examples

because of a lack of communication. In conclusion, In these ,phenomena electronic devices are able to talk quickly and get knowledge easily.

However

, it

also

intrudes on people’s

clues

and cannot communicate for a long period. For these reasons, I personally think that there are advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Submitted by yup on Fri May 26 2023

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task response

Focus on addressing the prompt directly and providing a clear opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the overall structure and coherence of the essay to ensure a logical flow of ideas throughout.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

Many young people do not spend their holidays and weekends doing outdor activities like hiking and climbing in nstural environment. Whu is this case? How theycsn be encouraged to go out?

Many small businesses are being forced to close because they cannot compete with multinational corporations. What problems does this cause, and how can those problems be solved?

University should accept equal number of male and female students in every subject. What extent do you agree or disagree?

Some young people like to copy the behavior and clothes of famous Korean people today. Why do you think this is happening? What impacts may it have on society?