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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that high school
students
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 should be made to do some unsalaried
work
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 in their communities.
While
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 I do believe that
students
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 can benefit from charity
work
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, I disagree with the idea of making
such
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 programs compulsory. On the one hand, there are some benefits to doing
such
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 voluntary jobs. High school
students
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 are able to assist people who are disabled and live alone through volunteer activities.
This
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 charity
work
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 is a great way to foster a sense of responsibility.
Such
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 characteristics in these adolescents create a positive image for all senior high
students
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 as a whole in public.
In addition
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,
this
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 training helps them to gather practical experience or look for jobs in the future.
For example
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, environmental sanitation
work
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 needs adequate practice.
On the other hand
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,there are more drawbacks to doing some unpaid
work
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.
Firstly
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,the major aim of the
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
 is to study, and they have a high level of learning pressure on them. They are unable to afford plenty of time consumption.
Secondly
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, the lack of service experience will lead to mistakes and misunderstandings in their future jobs.
Such
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 errors and failures are hard to evaluate.
Finally
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, certain services are harmful to undergraduates.
For example
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,commanding traffic on roads will do harm to their physical health, and sometimes they can get sick. In conclusion, I can understand the reason why individuals tip the balance in favour of voluntary services, but I would argue that it is wrong to force every student to take part in these unpaid programs

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coherence and cohesion
Provide a clearer introduction and conclusion to effectively frame the argument
task achievement
Clearly express your agreement or disagreement with the idea of compulsory community service and support your position with specific examples
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