IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In the future, it seems more difficult to live on Earth. Some people think more money should be spent on researching another planet to live, such as Mars. To disagree with this statement?

#future #earth #people #money #planet
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In current times when humans are discovering and inventing different
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
 of technologies,they
also
Linking Words
 try to find somewhere else to live like Mars. Many people think that living on
plant
Correct your spelling
planet
show examples
eart
Correct your spelling
Earth
 will be more difficult in future, they want to move
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
Use synonyms
planat
Correct your spelling
planet
planets
 like Mars. They
also
Linking Words
 said that government should
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 more and more on researching
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
 on other
palant
Correct your spelling
plant
plants
.
Well
Add the punctuation
,Well
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and in
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I’ll support my opinion with some reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, plant
earth
Use synonyms
 is our
Use synonyms
planat
Correct your spelling
planet
, we should priorities it
Fix the infinitive
to make
show examples
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 it safe before investing
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 research on other
Use synonyms
planat
Correct your spelling
planet
planets
.we only have one
Earth
Use synonyms
 and it’s our responsibility to make it
sustainability
Replace the word
sustainable
show examples
 for
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 coming generations.
Linking Words
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
show examples
, The idea of living on
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
Use synonyms
planat
Correct your spelling
planet
planets
 seems
exiting
Correct your spelling
exciting
show examples
 but it is not possible for everyone to move on it.
In addition
Linking Words
, living on Mars is very difficult because they’re several reasons, first one is, there is no water on Mars. Water is a very basic necessity for human king
livings
Fix the agreement mistake
living
show examples
. Second is oxygen, humanity can not survive without oxygen and there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 no symptoms of air
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
found on Mars yet.
Instead
Linking Words
, we should focus on taking care of our
earth
Use synonyms
 and investing
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 sustainable technologies and practices.
This
Linking Words
include
Change the verb form
includes
show examples
 renewable energy sources, reducing waste and natural habitats.
Moreover
Linking Words
, investing
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 sustainable technologies can create lots of jobs.
For example
Linking Words
, using Solar raise to create solar energy and wind technology has led to the growth of jobs
as well as
Linking Words
Correct article usage
a decrease
show examples
decrease
Change the form of the verb
decreased
show examples
 use of fossil fuels, which main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 pollution on
earth
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, living on Mars is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
exiting
Correct your spelling
exciting
show examples
 idea but it
also
Linking Words
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
a lot
lots
show examples
 of
diffulties
Correct your spelling
difficulties
. It will not a practical solution for many humans.
Besides
Linking Words
 that, we should try to
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
 our
Use synonyms
planat
Correct your spelling
planet
plant
instead
Linking Words
 of
leave
Wrong verb form
leaving
show examples
 it and
move
Wrong verb form
moving
show examples
 somewhere else.
This
Linking Words
 will ensure that our
earth
Use synonyms
 will
sustainable
Add a missing verb
have sustainable
show examples
 habitats for coming generations.
Submitted by sumairanjum60 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: