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Band 7.5

The charts show average levels of participation in education and the highest education level of adults from 2000 to 2010 in Singapore.

The charts show average levels of participation in education and the highest education level of adults from 2000 to 2010 in Singapore.
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The bar chart gives information about the average year students spend at
school
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the pie charts detail the different educational levels of Singaporean adults between 2000 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, people tend to spend more time in
school
Use synonyms
 and there is a growth between boys and girls over the
years
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, more and more people in
this
Linking Words
 country achieved higher qualifications during the period surveyed. Regarding the bar chart, in 2000, Singaporean men spent about 9
years
Use synonyms
 in
school
Use synonyms
, slightly higher than women, only about 8
years
Use synonyms
. Over a 10-year period, the number of
years
Use synonyms
 of schooling for adult males increased steadily, reaching a peak of almost 12
years
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
, the figure for women remained nearly the same for the first 3
years
Use synonyms
 before showing a bit of an improvement, finishing at less than 9
years
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. As can be seen from the pie charts, in 2000, nearly one-third of Singapore's population finished high
school
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. The figures for primary and secondary schools were almost identical, at 30% respectively, compared to nearly 8% studying for a
master
Change noun form
master's
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 degree. After 10
years
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, the level of education people in Singapore achieved was significantly higher, with nearly 33% of college degrees, and only 2% finished primary
school
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.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words school, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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