Individual greed and selfishness have been the basic of modern society. Some people think that we must return to the older and more traditional values of respects for the family and the local community in order to create a better world to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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this

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modern epoch, our society considers thinking for themselves only and being greedy is the major Operandi.

However

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, it's our core responsibility to give back to our culture and tradition by respecting the community in order to maintain harmony around the globe is the thinking of some folk.

Although

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every human is into running in the global race and following the trend which is being spread worldwide, the values of ethics are fading away which will not be available to the future generation if not preserved. I completely agree with

this

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viewpoint and there any many reasons which will be discussed below. First and foremost, globalisation is one of the biggest culprits that has affected modern society with its global products.

Hence

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, the population do not prefer locally made goods.

For example

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, in Bangladesh, the biggest cotton fabric producer, residents prefer wearing branded clothes despite considering the garments made in their country which are not only cheaper but

also

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have better quality. Certainly, the significance of our tradition and culture is

getting faded

Wrong verb form

fading

show examples

despite being respected.

Thus

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, modernisation has taken over the customs and importance of ethics in communities throughout the globe.

Secondly

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, migration has been increasing

due to

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which people leave their homeland to settle abroad permanently and adapt their accustoms which eventually leads to

decreasing

Replace the word

a decrease in

show examples

the value of their own culture.

For instance

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, in Canada, many people are migrating from India specifically from the northern part and they are trying to adjust to Canadian life despite staying in their home country and flourishing their own traditions.

Consequently

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this

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change has led to the degradation of the importance of the tradition. If

this

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trend

will continue

Wrong verb form

continues

show examples

to elevate

then

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most of our upcoming generation will not be aware of the ethics and background. In conclusion, the greed to grow is being increased in individuals which has led to the decrease in our cultural values that need to be preserved before it's too late.

This

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could be done if we try to respect our locally made products and stay in our birth country.

ramanpreetkaursetiaSat May 27 2023

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Task Achievement

The essay presents relevant points but lacks clear and developed reasoning and examples. Focus on providing a more balanced and thorough analysis of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Make sure to include a well-structured introduction and a concise conclusion that summarizes the main points.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

344 words

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Individual greed and selfishness have been the basic of modern society. Some people think that we must return to the older and more traditional values of respects for the family and the local community in order to create a better world to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that planting trees in open space cities and towns is more important than building houses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It has been observed that in many countries not enough student are choosing to study science subjects at university. What do you think are the causes of the problem? What are the effects on society?