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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean Island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean Island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words
#tourists #caribbean #island #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The diagram illustrates how
Use synonyms
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of
tourists
Use synonyms
 visited a Caribbean Island over a period of 7 years.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Linking Words
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
end
Add a comma
,end
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 the total
number
Use synonyms
 of
tourists
Use synonyms
 was high despite the slow rise through the years. In the first year, they stood at 1
million
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visitors
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 and rose constantly to reach 1.5
million
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 in 2012.
This
Linking Words
 was followed by another constant increase,
although
Linking Words
 much steeper, in 2015 when the
number
Use synonyms
 of travellers was about 2.7
million
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.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 upward trend was suddenly broken and
Correct article usage
the
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percentage of
tourists
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 remained relatively static for one year. Eventually, the
number
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 of
tourists
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 saw a significant rise in 2017.
Moreover
Linking Words
,there are two places where
visitors
Use synonyms
 stayed
while
Linking Words
 their trip.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the beginning 0.25
million
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visitors
Use synonyms
 stayed on cruise
ship
Fix the agreement mistake
ships
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whereas
Linking Words
, 0.75
million
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
chosen
Wrong verb form
chose
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 an island. Both of them experienced drastic fluctuations between 2010 and 2017 and
Linking Words
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the end
number
Use synonyms
 of
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
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stayed
Wrong verb form
staying
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 on
island
Add an article
the island
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 was 1.5
million
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likewise
Linking Words
, the
number
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 of
visitors
Use synonyms
 stayed on cruise
ship
Fix the agreement mistake
ships
show examples
 was 2
million
Use synonyms
Submitted by muharodnoy on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, tourists, million, visitors with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 4 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuating trend
  • initially
  • significant increase
  • slight decline
  • momentary setback
  • steady increase
  • minor fluctuations
  • reaching a peak
  • moderate growth
  • notable growth
  • surge in popularity
  • seasonal or yearly factors
  • stagnation
  • growing appeal
  • visitors worldwide
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