Some feel that individuals should have the right to strike in all jobs while others feel there are exceptions. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some individuals claim that everybody
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
the
right
to
protest
in their jobs;
however
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others believe that they cannot
strike
in all works.
This
essay will emphasize both sides of doing strikes in all work areas. For
employees
Add a comma
,employees
show examples
strike
is a way to make their
sound
heard. In general, workers
protest
because of their low wages. To
protest
with a crowd, make their
sound
louder and because of
this
employer
Fix the agreement mistake
employers
show examples
take the employees more
serious
Change the word
seriously
show examples
.
For example
, in
England
Add a comma
,England
show examples
strikes are often and workers have the
right
to express their thoughts about their
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
and usually managers are hearing their
sound
and changing some conditions
accordingly
to their needs.
On the other hand
, some people agree that there are some exceptional jobs that they should not have the
right
to
strike
. As
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
mentioned above workers
protesting
Wrong verb form
protest
show examples
to make
them
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
sound
heard;
however
, it would not be fair to take
others
Change noun form
others'
other's
show examples
right
to go to work
while
doing
strike
.
For instance
, in metro or train strikes employees stop working and because of them all the transportation
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
disrupt.
Due to
this
, the jobs that
affects
Change the verb form
affect
show examples
others should not have the
right
to
protest
. Obesity is a disease which can pass through genes. There are so many diseases which
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people who are already genetically vulnerable. Even though unhealthy food triggers obesity
genetic
Replace the word
genetics
show examples
is a very crucial point which causes overweight.
However
, parents should not be responsible
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
their
Change the word
the
show examples
genes which passed to their children because they do not have any control over
this
process. Recent research concluded that 65% of overweight children have
genetic
Add an article
a genetic
show examples
tendency to become obese.
Submitted by mervemuygun on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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