These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?
The number of fathers staying at home taking
care
of their children has significantly increased in the past few years. This
essay will discuss the reasons behind this
phenomenon and whether it is a positive or negative development.
The relationship between men and women has radically evolved since the twentieth century. Thus
, a girl nowadays can work as much as a boy does and the latter can take care
of the kids. For example
, in my family, my mother is a working lawyer and it is usually my father who takes care
of my siblings and I
.
The fact that more men stay inside to look after their kids constitutes a positive development for Change the pronoun
me
the
society because children are now raised by both their parents equally. Traditionally, the father would be very absent in Correct article usage
apply
its
Correct pronoun usage
his
childrens’
life. Change noun form
children’s
However
, now that things have changed, kids are raised in a more healthy and equal environment, where the husband and wife have the same rights and importance, which inspires them. For instance
, little girls are inspired by their working mothers, and boys learn that it is possible for them to stay inside to take care
of their future son or daughter.
In conclusion, the increase in the number of men taking care
of their babies can be explained by the evolution in
relationships, which has allowed women to go out to work more. Change preposition
of
This
constitutes a benefit for the
society because now that both Correct article usage
apply
parts
are equal in the couple, boys and girls are inspired to become like their parental figures and they learn that it is possible for them both to work and Correct your spelling
parties
to
stay at home.Verb problem
apply
Submitted by santos_dij on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Provide more points to comprehensively cover the reasons for this trend; possible areas include economic factors, changing societal roles, or increased support for parental leave.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph includes clear topic sentences to maintain focus and improve overall structure.
task achievement
Use more specific examples or data to support points, rather than anecdotal personal examples; this will enhance the overall credibility of your argument.
introduction conclusion present
Strong introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, providing a clear starting and ending point for the reader.
task achievement
The essay addresses both parts of the task, discussing the reasons for the increased number of stay-at-home fathers as well as the broader societal impact of this trend.
logical structure
Logical progression between ideas and well-organized paragraphs contribute to overall readability.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.