These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

Before, most mothers stayed at home to manage the house
while
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fathers went out to work. But today,
this
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tendency has been reversed.
This
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inversion can be explained by the multiple years of fight led by women to get similar rights as men. And I definitely think that the fact that right now mothers can have a job at the same level as fathers and do not just stay at home, is a positive development.
This
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social change is the consequence of years of fighting. Certain women played a significant role , like Simone de Beauvoir in France or Clara Campoamor in Spain. These two people , among a lot of others, have dedicated their lives to the purpose of improving their condition. And I think that it is after many demonstrations in the streets, many declarations that they
finally
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found their place in society. And
that is
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why today they have equal rights as men.
Moreover
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, as there are more women than men in the world, it is logical that these days, female parents have more jobs than males.
This
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social change is a positive development , and it is beneficial for our society. Indeed, first of all, it provokes social advantages, because it is a symbol that women’s situation has improved, and that has reduced inequalities. And
then
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, it provokes economic advantages.
According to
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a study made by the University of Oxford in 2023, the huge arrival of females on the work market has increased by 25% the world's production between 1970 and 2020.
To conclude
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, the fact that, these days, female parents have employment
while
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fathers stay at home is
due to
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a lot of feminist movements, and in my opinion, it is a good development for our community.

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coherence
Make one main idea in each paragraph and add a clear link to the main view in the end of the paragraph.
coherence
Keep ideas simple and clear. Check you have a strong link between reason and result for your view.
task
Back up main points with clear reasons or facts. Try to explain how examples help your view.
task
In the intro, state your view and what you will say. In the conclusion, briefly restate your view.
accuracy
Be careful with facts. Some sentences may be not true or not well kept. Check names and numbers.
opinion
The writer shows a clear view that the change is good for society.
structure
There are steps of idea like cause and effect and a result.
lexical
Examples of real people are used.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • breadwinner
  • caregiving
  • paternal leave
  • societal perceptions
  • gender roles
  • flexible working conditions
  • personal preference
  • father-child relationship
  • emotional and social development
  • household responsibilities
  • career opportunities
  • professional achievements
  • balanced parenting
  • earning potential
  • social stigma
  • societal pressure
  • discrimination
  • traditional mindsets
  • resentment
  • adjustment
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