It is important for people to take riske, both in their professional lives and their personal lifes. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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Most people believe that taking risks in life is crucial, and it can lead to a better future. For me, there are a lot more advantages of doing

this

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and I'll go over some relevant benefits of

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assumption in

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essay. Personally, It is already reckoned that taking big risks in our professional dwell and in our personal life is a necessary thing to do in our lifetime at least once.

Firstly

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, doing something dangerous, which might bring fortune and fame to some people.

Secondly

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, it is an

unforgetful

Correct your spelling

unforgettable

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fun thing to do.

For example

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, taking a big exam is a kind of heart beating, but it means you do some act to achieve your goal. But once you

passed

Wrong verb form

pass

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that hard exam, you will be more confident in any hard situation.

Moreover

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, unpredictable and dangerous things are scary, but if you have a good plan, and

having

Verb problem

are

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full of measurements, you have to try those,

such

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as changing a mundane office job that you hate to do, updating the looks you never had before, and open your heart to another person that you secretly admired for a long time etcetera.

For instance

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, the president of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, decided to quit a top university, Harvard, only

for chasing

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to chase

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his dream

for create

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of creating

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a big network.

Although

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he was a top student at the university, he realized that he had to take a huge risk for his aim.

To conclude

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, if some individuals are desperate

for changing

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to change

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their current situation, they have to "jump into fire" sometimes. It may seem arduous in the first place, but numerous advantages still exist behind the challenging things. If you once used to do it, you feel proud of yourself after successfully

overcome

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overcoming it

show examples

Submitted by Bolorbatbold99 on Tue May 30 2023

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coherence cohesion

Improve logical structure by organizing the essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences and supporting details.

coherence cohesion

The introduction lacks a clear thesis statement and the conclusion should summarize the main points and provide a final perspective.

task achievement

The response addresses the question with relevant examples, but does not fully develop the discussion.

task achievement

Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the writer's perspective and the conclusion provides a final opinion.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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It is important for people to take riske, both in their professional lives and their personal lifes. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

The most important aim of science should be to improve peoples lives. To what extent do you agre or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that children are responsible for their crimes and should be punished for them. Others think the parents are in charge and should be punished instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People in the current generation are not fit and active. What are the problems with this issue? What can be done to encourage people to participate in sports activities?

There are several factors that motivate people to stay in the workforce, and money is the most important factor. To what extent do you agree or disagree?