IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

So,Almost everybody nowadays is found using personal vehicle for travelling purpose. What are the reasons of this increasing trend? Explain what negative outcomes may be faced in the society due to this.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, the
use
Use synonyms
 of personal
vehicles
Use synonyms
 for daily transportation has increased significantly. Several factors are formed, including convenience, affordability, and inadequate public transportation systems.
However
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 private
vehicles
Use synonyms
 offer comfort and flexibility, their excessive
use
Use synonyms
 can promote several issues, including environmental degradation and urban stress. The primary reason for the growing reliance on personal
vehicles
Use synonyms
 is convenience. Unlike public transport, private
cars
Use synonyms
 allow individuals to travel at a preferred time without being bound by fixed schedules.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, with the increasing affordability of
cars
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 competitive pricing and advanced technologies, people are encouraged to have their own
vehicles
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, public transport in many regions is often unreliable, overcrowded, or poorly designed.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 situation makes personal
vehicles
Use synonyms
 a more attractive option for daily travel. Despite these advantages, the widespread usage of personal
cars
Use synonyms
 poses serious challenges.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it contributes significantly harmful to environmental pollution. The burning of fossil fuels
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
cars
Use synonyms
 releases harmful gases like carbon dioxide, leading to air pollution and climate change.
Secondly
Linking Words
, increased the number of personal
cars
Use synonyms
 results in traffic, especially in urban areas, causing stress and increasing complexity among the people. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 personal
vehicles
Use synonyms
 provide convenience and flexibility, their excessive
use
Use synonyms
 has several negative consequences,
such
Linking Words
 as environmental pollution and stressed traffic conditions. To overcome
this
Linking Words
 issue, governments should invest in improving public transportation to encourage people to
use
Use synonyms
 alternative ways to travel, thereby reducing the negative impact on society.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to reinforce your arguments, such as statistics on pollution from vehicles or specific issues faced by cities due to traffic congestion.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases more frequently to enhance the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs, which will improve coherence.
task achievement
Clarify the negative impacts by developing each point with additional detail, which will help in demonstrating a deep understanding of the issues involved.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic well and presents both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction outlines the main points effectively, giving a good framework for the rest of the essay.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: