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Band 3

Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information in the graphs below. You should write at least 150 words.

#report #university #lecturer #information #graphs
The given two bar graphs illustrate the number of
deaths
 and the medical research funding
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 six different
diseases
 in Someland in the year 1990.
Overall
, we notice that the number of
deaths
 is lower in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
diseases
 where money is spent on its research.
Although
 TB has the highest
deaths
Correct quantifier usage
number of deaths
show examples
,
money
Correct article usage
the money
show examples
 spent is
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
. Meanwhile, AIDS gets the biggest
fund
.
Firstly
, death
due to
 TB is highest, where around 1.75
million
 people have died. It is followed by Diarrhoea, Malaria, Tropical
diseases
, AIDS and
finally
 Leprosy respectively, where they have less than 0.5
million
deaths
 each. Meanwhile, with a mammoth
fund
 of around 175
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
, AIDS got the biggest medical research
fund
 among all the others. Leprosy and Tropical
diseases
 have around 75
million
dollars
 each, followed by Diarrhoea with just above 50
million
dollars
 and Malaria with 50
million
dollars
. TB gets the lowest
fund
, with just around 25
million
dollars
.
Submitted by Dhruv Dodia on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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