Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

Foreign
movies
are often considered more interesting to be watched by locals than their local films.
Therefore
, in
this
essay, I will discuss what are the causes of
this
problem and why the governments should give financial
support
to the local film industries. Many locals watch
movies
for dating or killing time to satisfy their hobbies,
therefore
, they want something different from the usual
movies
that they watch.
This
uniqueness is only found in foreign
movies
because they usually serve different plots or stories, so the locals are intrigued to watch their
movies
.
Secondly
, the effects are incredible
due to
their sophisticated and advanced
devices
which are used in their
movie
production. These kinds of advantages are making them more enjoyable and fascinating to watch compared to local
movies
. Following these problems, the
government
can
support
the local
movie
industries financially.
For example
, the
government
can send their people to learn about
movie
production from well-known
movie
producers because it can help them learn about how the
movies
were created. Eventually, they can apply it during their
movie
-making.
Nonetheless
, these skilled manpower need advanced
devices
to
support
their work. The
government
can overcome
this
problem by giving financial
support
for
devices
which are used to produce a high-quality film. In conclusion, foreign
movies
are considered more enjoyable to watch owing to their special effects and unique stories. The
government
should help the local film industries financially because it can be used to help send talented manpower to a
movie
production school and buy advanced
devices
that can be used to produce high-quality films.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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relevant specific examples
You have done well in addressing the topic and providing reasons and solutions. However, more specific examples could enhance your arguments further. For example, mentioning particular foreign films and their characteristics as compared to local films would strengthen your points.
clear comprehensive ideas
Generally, your ideas are clear and comprehensive, but some areas could be developed with more depth. For instance, expand on why the government's financial support is crucial and provide more details on how this could be implemented.
logical structure
Your essay is logically structured, but it could benefit from smoother transitions between paragraphs. Using more transitional phrases or linking words would improve the flow of the essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame the essay. The introduction sets the stage well, and the conclusion summarizes the main points succinctly.
supported main points
Your main points are well supported with logical reasoning. The points about the uniqueness and advanced technology in foreign films are well explained.
complete response
You have provided a complete response to the task by addressing both parts of the prompt—reasons for the preference for foreign films and the role of government support in local film industries.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • Cultural exchange
  • Cinematic expertise
  • Diverse narratives
  • Enriching cultural experience
  • Linguistic proficiency
  • Cinematography advancements
  • Government subsidies
  • Promote local talent
  • Economic sustainability
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