Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

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Foreign
movies
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are often considered more interesting to be watched by locals than their local films.
Therefore
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, in
this
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essay, I will discuss what are the causes of
this
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problem and why the governments should give financial
support
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to the local film industries. Many locals watch
movies
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for dating or killing time to satisfy their hobbies,
therefore
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, they want something different from the usual
movies
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that they watch.
This
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uniqueness is only found in foreign
movies
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because they usually serve different plots or stories, so the locals are intrigued to watch their
movies
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.
Secondly
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, the effects are incredible
due to
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their sophisticated and advanced
devices
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which are used in their
movie
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production. These kinds of advantages are making them more enjoyable and fascinating to watch compared to local
movies
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. Following these problems, the
government
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can
support
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the local
movie
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industries financially.
For example
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, the
government
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can send their people to learn about
movie
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production from well-known
movie
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producers because it can help them learn about how the
movies
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were created. Eventually, they can apply it during their
movie
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-making.
Nonetheless
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, these skilled manpower need advanced
devices
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to
support
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their work. The
government
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can overcome
this
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problem by giving financial
support
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for
devices
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which are used to produce a high-quality film. In conclusion, foreign
movies
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are considered more enjoyable to watch owing to their special effects and unique stories. The
government
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should help the local film industries financially because it can be used to help send talented manpower to a
movie
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production school and buy advanced
devices
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that can be used to produce high-quality films.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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relevant specific examples
You have done well in addressing the topic and providing reasons and solutions. However, more specific examples could enhance your arguments further. For example, mentioning particular foreign films and their characteristics as compared to local films would strengthen your points.
clear comprehensive ideas
Generally, your ideas are clear and comprehensive, but some areas could be developed with more depth. For instance, expand on why the government's financial support is crucial and provide more details on how this could be implemented.
logical structure
Your essay is logically structured, but it could benefit from smoother transitions between paragraphs. Using more transitional phrases or linking words would improve the flow of the essay.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame the essay. The introduction sets the stage well, and the conclusion summarizes the main points succinctly.
supported main points
Your main points are well supported with logical reasoning. The points about the uniqueness and advanced technology in foreign films are well explained.
complete response
You have provided a complete response to the task by addressing both parts of the prompt—reasons for the preference for foreign films and the role of government support in local film industries.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • Cultural exchange
  • Cinematic expertise
  • Diverse narratives
  • Enriching cultural experience
  • Linguistic proficiency
  • Cinematography advancements
  • Government subsidies
  • Promote local talent
  • Economic sustainability
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