Some people believe that we should celebrate National Holidays, Whilst others oppose the idea and say that the Government should invest this money in health and education. Discuss Both Views and What is your personal opinion in this regard.

#people #holidays #whilst #idea #government #money #health #education

A few sections of people

considers

Change the verb form

consider

show examples

that the supreme need to celebrate historical holidays,

whereas

opponents believe that higher authorities ought to spend funds on the academic field and well-being.

Although

people would connect with their culture, the population could improve their physical

health

and get success in their latter stage of life. Considering the first viewpoint, individuals may attach to their traditions. To elaborate, if statutory bodies celebrate the national holidays, people might know about the historical periods and who martyrs for their nation.

For instance

, a survey conducted by the Indian Organization revealed that It was on 15th August 1947 that India was declared independent from British colonialism, and the reins of control were handed over to the leaders of the Country. Taking the second viewpoint, there are various issues

such

as literacy rate, and

health

issues are proliferating continuously around the world, so government should not only invest their money in constructing playgrounds or parks but

also

in educational institutes with the assistance of

this

they can survive from

health

ailments.

For example

, it is an article published by The Tribune newspaper showed that in America law authority has opened universities and colleges in every town and give education free of cost and

also

a fitness centre with

this

they are improving physical and mental

health

To conclude

, it is essential to represent the culture to the public and it is

also

crucial for commoners if they give an opportunity for education and fitness.

Submitted by deepikanayyar1996 on Sun Jun 04 2023

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that we should celebrate National Holidays, Whilst others oppose the idea and say that the Government should invest this money in health and education. Discuss Both Views and What is your personal opinion in this regard.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some people believe that students should learn both science of meal and how to make it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with each other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Some people believe that we should reduce air traveling for ecological reasons. Do you think that this would be a positive or negative development and how it could it be achieved?