IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer. and the poor are even getting poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?

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Overpopulation is a major concern of poverty.
However
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, In the present time, the difference between wealthy
people
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 and the needy is too wide.
This
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 essay intends to analyse the problems caused by a
lack
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 of
education
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, and unfamiliarity with
rights
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 and suggest ways to mitigate the issues. There are many factors behind
this
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 problem, but the significant one is the
lack
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 of
education
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 among poor
people
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. To explain
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
,
due to
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 a
lack
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 of
education
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, they are doing illegal activities
such
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 as Murder, Robbery, Rape, Theft, and drug addiction, which they divert in the wrong way.
Secondly
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, wealthy
people
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 run their high businesses by which they earn a lot of money from it on a monthly basis, and poor
people
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 work for them on low wages for required daily expenses or to live.
For example
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, In Nigeria in 2019 studies revealed that 40% of unemployed youth committed a criminal offence.
As a result
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, illiterate
people
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 mostly choose the wrong path. There are many solutions for tackling the issue. Authorities can start campaigns in cities, and public places and raise awareness. To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, the government is the key of mitigate poverty
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which
Correct word choice
and
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 they want to do some social media awareness about
public's
Correct article usage
the public's
show examples
rights
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 (law) and arrange a campaign in cities, and public places because of that poor society know their
rights
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 and not be exploited.
In addition
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 to
this
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, authorities should launch a subsidy project for the poor public
due to
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this
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 they can start up their small businesses and live a peaceful life.
For instance
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, the Government of India introduced a plan in 2019, Sahay Yojna, in which they provide machinery to the poor public without any interest on borrow. In conclusion, the gap between wealthy and needy
people
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 is wider because of knowledge.
This
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 essay discussed problems
such
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 as
lack
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 of
education
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, new to their
rights
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, and providing solutions like arranging campaigns and providing subsidies for needy
people
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.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic disparity
  • crime rates
  • wealth inequality
  • social segregation
  • education gap
  • affluent
  • mortality rates
  • uneven access
  • hopelessness
  • disenfranchisement
  • progressive taxation
  • redistribute
  • quality education
  • social programs
  • economic disadvantage
  • higher wages
  • entrepreneurship
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