IELTS essay, topic: Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#ielts #topic #museums #charge #admission #outweigh

Museums are classic depictions of great history. Entrance fees are made compulsory in most of these places,

while

a few do not charge any.In

this

,essay I will be addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of collecting money from visitors and explaining why the latter outweigh the former. A few merits of

this

tradition have been outlined.When the organisation

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

interviewed about the incentive behind the pass money,they mentioned a few.One

such

important is the contribution to the maintenance of the great buildings,

sculptures

Correct word choice

and sculptures

show examples

and mostly for the staff salaries.

Therefore

, the museum would be able to make some part of the expenditure

Rephrase

rather

show examples

than solely depending on the funds.

Secondly

, these places are often overcrowded which is a big hurdle to face for workers. Having payment would help control the flow. One of the biggest disadvantages of

following

this

trend is affordability which means only a few people are able to access the historic building

due to

financial issues.As per research conducted by history degree holders, on having entrance fees out of 150 people who wanted to go in, only 80 could pay the visit .Another reason is these places are the platform to educate the students in the past as they have a great collection like swords, shields, sculptures, the layout of great buildings and many more. Charging education is a crime morally and ethically.They are turning commercial.

To conclude

,though the collection of money has its pros, they are outweighed by the demerits.,

Instead

museums can collect only a small amount which is affordable for most people. \

Submitted by sreya.nimmagadda9 on Tue Jun 06 2023

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task response

Make sure to fully address the advantages and disadvantages of museums charging for admission. Provide more detailed examples and explanations to support your points.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the introduction and conclusion to clearly introduce the topic and summarize the main arguments.

task response

The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of museums charging for admission.

task response

Good use of examples to support the points made in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

256 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Admission fees
Revenue generation
Facilities
Exhibits
Maintenance and preservation
Artifacts
Exclusive exhibitions
Temporary exhibitions
Overcrowding
Equitable access
Discounted rates
Educational experience

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IELTS essay, topic: Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others, ​however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.​ Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is important to give gifts to friends and family to show that we care about them. Others think that there are better ways to show that we care. Discuss both views and give your opinion ?

Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others,  however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.    Discuss both views and give your own opinion.