Write about the following topic: Some people think that subjects like arts, music, drama and creative writing contribute more towards a child's overall development. The school curriculum should provide more time for these subjects to be taught if the school wants all-round development of children. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Recently,in the
school
world there was a huge difference between the two or three decades and now ,so when people learn in old schools they did not reach any creative things to develop themself but now and the future ıt have been developing for
children
's
overall
. Yet , there is some disagreement as to whether the rising
time
in some subjects is necessary or not .
While
there are certainly valid arguments to the contrary , I personally believe that
time
is enough for the development of a child . The reasons to support my view are as follows. First of all, it is an undeniable fact that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
subject prepares the
children
for
the
Change the word
their
show examples
future
life
of them and
this
subject
time
need to organise perfectly because when
children
learn maths they
also
need to learn something about music , sport or something else. Every
time
of
life
we can use something which learn from
school
. Obviously ,
children
need to learn and study for every lesson equally , after that if the child
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
talented in one of them , the child chooses the perfect career path for his
life
.
On the other hand
,ı need to accept that some schools apply different purposes for
children'seducation
Correct your spelling
children education
such
as music
school
. Sometimes it would be more important to develop for
children
.
However
, in my own
belief
Add a comma
,belief
show examples
every
students
Change to a singular noun
student
show examples
need to take every lesson to start
life
from scratch.
To sum up
, I once again restate my view that to start
life
is need necessary to learn everything about lessons because we do not,
now
Correct your spelling
know
show examples
what's the future supplies for us .
Submitted by steam_ahmet2004 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • fostering creativity
  • emotional intelligence
  • empathy
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving
  • academic achievement
  • curriculum integration
  • cognitive abilities
  • interpersonal skills
  • innovation
  • collaboration
  • multidisciplinary
  • self-expression
  • cultural awareness
  • innate talents
  • cognitive flexibility
  • extracurricular activities
  • core subjects
  • personal fulfillment
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