Some people think that hard working and determination are the key factors for being successful in the life, other people feel that other factors are important. Discuss both sides, what is your opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In modern society, there has been an ongoing debate about the way to success. Some believe that the key factors to success in the whole of human life are to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hard-worker person and have great determination. Meanwhile, others argue that there are other elements that are more crucial to bring
people
Use synonyms
into a successful life. The following essay will discuss both points of view and present my point of view. It is undeniable that hard work and determination are the key factors for being successful in life.
This
Linking Words
is mostly because both characters can bring
people
Use synonyms
or companies to reach a huge achievement.
For instance
Linking Words
, approximately two decades ago Nokia was the most popular Android phone around the world and leads the market. Since that, Samsung is working hard to develop its phone
in addition
Linking Words
with great determination.
As a result
Linking Words
, nowadays we can see Samsung take the market.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
believe that apart from both factors mentioned above, there are other elements which are more important to make
people
Use synonyms
successful. Other elements
such
Linking Words
as social relations
also
Linking Words
influence success. Humans as social beings need each other
Submitted by Deddymus on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • skill development
  • overcoming obstacles
  • social connections
  • economic background
  • grit
  • entrepreneurs
  • existing connections
  • industries
  • career paths
  • balanced perspective
What to do next:
Look at other essays: