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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the Oil Production in several African Countries from 2000 to 2004

The graph below shows the Oil Production in several African Countries from 2000 to 2004
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The table compares the
oil
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production
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 in four different African countries,
Nigeria
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,
Chad
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,
Congo
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Brazaville
Correct your spelling
Brazzaville
 and Cote d’Ivoire from 2000 to 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that
Nigeria
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 registered the highest
oil
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production
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 in all the years.
Also
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 the
oil
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production
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 in
Chad
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 and Cote d’Ivoire increased, it fell in
Congo
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Brazaville
Correct your spelling
Brazzaville
 and fluctuated in
Nigeria
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. There was no
oil
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production
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 in
Chad
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 from 2000 to 2002. In 2003,
Chad
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 produced about 50,000
barrels
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, and
this
Linking Words
 increased and reached 290,000
barrels
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 in 2004.
Similarly
Linking Words
, Cote d’Ivoire’s
production
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also
Linking Words
 increased from 8000
barrels
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 in 2000
,
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apply
show examples
 to 45,000
barrels
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 by 2004.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
production
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 of
oil
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 in
Congo
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Brazaville
Correct your spelling
Brazzaville
 decreased continuously. In 2000, 280,000
barrels
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 of
oil
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 were produced in
Congo
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 and its
production
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 fell by 10,000-20,000
barrels
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 year by year and reached 205,000
barrels
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 in 2004.
Finally
Linking Words
,
oil
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production
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 in
Nigeria
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 varied. In 2000, 2,000,000
barrels
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 were produced and
this
Linking Words
 increased slightly to 2,100,000 by 2001.
However
Linking Words
, in the next
year
Add a comma
,year
show examples
production
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 fell by 200,000
barrels
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. 2002 onwards
production
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 increased continuously and in 2004, a
production
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 of 2,200,000
barrels
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 was recorded.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words oil, production, nigeria, chad, congo, barrels with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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