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Writing Samples /
Band 7

Young people spend too much time and money following fashion trends (clothing, technology). To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

#people #time #money #fashion #trends #technology
It has always been debatable that the young generation utilizes quite money and time to walk behind vogue
such
 as attire and electronic devices. I partially agree with
this
 given statement and
this
 essay will shed light upon my perspective in the subsequent paragraphs
along with
 a reasoned conclusion. Foremost, the prominent reason behind my agreement is that youth should follow trends throughout their life with the assistance of
this
 they know about the culture of other countries and if they use too much time on digitalization
such
 as smartphones, laptops and many more, they may get knowledge regarding what is going on society and
also
 related to their academic field and work.
For instance
, a survey conducted by Harward University revealed that in India young
people
 are spending most of their cash on fashion trends with
this
 they know modernization. Paradoxically, the fundamental cause behind my disagreement is that maintaining the latest fashion has negative impacts on the community. It would burden the budgets of young
people
 because many of them just spend money on fashionable clothes
instead
 of courses
such
 as foreign language and IT in order to improve their important skills.
For example
, an article published by The Tribune Newspaper showed that approximately 65% of young individuals are unskilled as they do not expend their funds on their education,
whereas
 they have
curiosity
Add an article
the curiosity
a curiosity
show examples
 to follow the new trends.
Hence
, it puts an adverse impact on
people
's life.
To conclude
, once
people
 spend capital on fashionable clothes, it might give them many opportunities ,
otherwise
Add a comma
,otherwise
show examples
this
 would have an unfavourable effect on society.
Submitted by deepikanayyar1996 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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