Health experts say that obese women and women over the age of 40 should not be given free fertility treatment (IVF) because they are more likely to experience health problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

#health #experts #women #age #fertility #treatment #ivf

Nowadays, it is believed by many individuals that doctors should not provide

IVF

to all ladies and they should consider their

age

and body condition carefully, beforehand providing them with free fertility

treatment

. I agree with

this

testimonial because over the

age

of 40 and obese

women

are prone to more

diseases

and they do not have enough physical and mental strength to grow their newly born babies.

To begin

with, the most prominent reason to support the view is that as soon as

women

reach the

age

of 40, the strength of their reproductive organs starts declining and there is enormously less chance of getting positive results from

IVF

treatment

this

is waste of resources and after experimenting these treatments on the body

women

are prone to many

diseases

Moreover

, ladies who already have health problems

such

as obesity can never get positive results from Free fertility

treatment

because the obese body catches disease instantly.

However

, if they still go through

this

their babies might be born with

diseases

like AIDS.

For instance

, in 2020 after

IVF

treatment

on fewer ladies in India, some kids were born with

diseases

and when the reasons were explored for

this

, were obesity to the mothers.

Therefore

, in India

women

with any type of disease are not allowed to have

IVF

treatments for free. Another primary reason is that after the

age

of 40 individuals start developing the issues of forgetting things instantly because they are losing their mental energy.

Likewise

, an obese person does not have enough physical stability to provide good care to young ones.

For example

, to secure the future of posterity the government is working on making strict regulations

while

rendering

IVF

medication.

To conclude

, as per the reasons aforementioned above, one reaches the logical repercussions that

IVF

cure should not be provided for free to obese

as well as

females over the maturity of 40 should not allow these treatments.

Submitted by ss6802125 on Tue Mar 19 2024

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Structure

Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction should outline your stance clearly. Each body paragraph should focus on one main idea, supported by examples or evidence. The conclusion should summarize your viewpoint succinctly.

Sentence Structure

Consider varied sentence structures to enhance readability. Using a mix of complex and simple sentences can make your essay more engaging and reflect a better command of the language.

Supporting Examples

Work on developing your arguments more thoroughly with clear, relevant examples. The examples should directly support your main points and be specific rather than generic or hypothetical.

Logic and Flow

Pay attention to your essay coherence by ensuring that ideas flow logically from one to the next. Using linking words and phrases can greatly help in achieving this.

Accuracy of Information

Avoid making unsupported claims or using potentially incorrect information (e.g., mentioning diseases like AIDS without relevant context or accurate medical knowledge). Ensure your arguments are well-researched and accurately presented.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

322 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

nuanced discussion
heightened health risks
public health and safety
discriminatory
individual health conditions
mitigate risks
mental health and well-being
deeply personal
equitable treatment
advancements in medical science
managed effectively
inclusive approach

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Health experts say that obese women and women over the age of 40 should not be given free fertility treatment (IVF) because they are more likely to experience health problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Environmental damage is a problem in most countries. What factors damage the environment and who should take responsibility?

Start here: in some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible.

Some people think governments should ban dangerous sports. Others, however, say people have the freedom to make their own decisions. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets, and there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.