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Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their family. Others believe that this is unnecessary or even negative. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #time
While
 family members play essential roles in the early life of their descendants regarding their characteristics and lifestyles, in my perspective, the positive impacts provoked by the time spent with peers should not be overlooked,
due to
 the acquisition of important
experience
 for being more independent. On the one hand, young people are able to inherit
tradition
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the tradition
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 from members
in
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of
show examples
 families for unique culture being passed down to the younger generation, on top of that, they are able to get
familier
Correct your spelling
familiar
 with certain professional areas to be more competitive compared to others.
For example
, many doctors
grown
Wrong verb form
grow
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 up in the family, that have many relatives
work
Correct pronoun usage
who work
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 in correlative professional fields,
who
Correct word choice
and
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 are able to share valuable
experience
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experiences
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.
On the other hand
, children who stay in
Correct pronoun usage
their confort
show examples
confort
Correct your spelling
comfort
 zones for too long could miss the chance of gaining new
experience
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experiences
show examples
 and updated information,
along with
 it, being
indepandand
Correct your spelling
independent
. In my perspective, it is crucial for students to study in educational institutions with peers and professional educators. It helps them to cultivate social skills and be able to deal
difficulties
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with difficulties
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 by themselves. Take early education institutions in Japan as an example, children will learn essential capacities to take care of themselves, including folding clothes, using
dinning
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dining
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 sets, and tidying
room
Correct article usage
the room
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, compared to at home where
eveything
Correct your spelling
everything
 will be done for them. To summarise, it is true that people in a family have
great
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a great
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 influence on their children, and could provide crucial
advises
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advice
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 in life and future careers.
However
, in my opinion, I tend to
agree
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onagree
toagree
withagree
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 the opponents who believe youth should spend more time with friends
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 similar ages and teachers on campuses to have a wide range of
experience
 and latest knowledge.
Submitted by unapoya0916 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fosters
  • Sense of belonging
  • Transmission
  • Cultural and moral values
  • Overdependence
  • Hinder
  • Social development
  • Autonomy
  • Well-rounded development
  • Invaluable
  • Emotional and moral development
  • Self-reliance
  • Diverse interests
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