MORE AND MORE YOUNG PEOPLE ARE USING DRUG AND ALCOHAL AND AS A RESULT, BREAKING A LAW. WHAT ARE CAUSES OF THIS PROBLEM WHAT ARE THE SOME POSSIBLE SOLLUTIONS.

#people #drug #alcohal #law #sollutions

In the modern world, getting intoxicated is the new trend.

Therefore

, youngsters are

being

Verb problem

becoming

show examples

addicted and the number is ever-growing. Who should be obligated for

this

? Is it because of the government or the unattended behaviour of parents? The question is straight clear and it is immediately required to take strict actions.

Firstly

, in many parts of the world, the public authority has legalised some sort of drugs and alcohol

while

it is not even regulated. Certainly, it attracts more consumers specifically young people who get influenced easily.

For example

, In British Columbia, weed is readily available at drug stores which has continuously elevated the count of purchasers.

Secondly

, both parents are working and they do not get time to spend with their offspring. The unattended behaviour gives them the freedom to do whatever they wish , not even restricting their alcohol.

However

, the main solution is to ban the sale of

such

products in the market. Entirely, the government has to make strict laws and regulations to stop the sale and purchase of goods that cause intoxication. Taking

this

into account, in India, an awareness program against drug addicts has forced the government to revise the rules in order to stop drug consumption.

Moreover

, it is true to say that children are purely the responsibility of the guardians and they should keep a regular check on their behaviour and teach them about things that are needed to avoid in life. In conclusion, higher authorities are first to be held responsible for more of the youth consuming alcohol and other similar products,

whereas

, the irresponsibility of parents is equally contributing towards the same. Before the situation gets

worst

Correct word choice

worse

show examples

, both groups should take preventive measures.

Submitted by ramanpreetkaursetia on Sat Jun 10 2023

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task response

Your essay addressed both the causes and possible solutions to the problem of increasing drug and alcohol use among young people. However, make sure to directly answer the questions and fully develop your ideas.

coherence and cohesion

You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion, but your essay lacks cohesive devices and the logical flow of ideas is somewhat disrupted. Use transition words and phrases to improve the coherence of your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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MORE AND MORE YOUNG PEOPLE ARE USING DRUG AND ALCOHAL AND AS A RESULT, BREAKING A LAW. WHAT ARE CAUSES OF THIS PROBLEM WHAT ARE THE SOME POSSIBLE SOLLUTIONS.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Historical artifacts should be brought back to their country of origin. To what extend do you agree/disagree?

In the future all cars ,buses and trucks will be driver less.The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driver less vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+