IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Art classes, like painting and drawing, are not as important as other subjects, so some people think that it should not be a compulsory subject at high school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#art #classes #subjects #people #school
I mostly agree that
art
classes
such
 as drawing and painting are not as important and
at
Change preposition
as
show examples
such
, they should not be made compulsory in high schools because when made compulsory, they do more harm than good to
students
 who do not particularly enjoy them.
While
 there are many
students
 who enjoy taking
art
classes
such
 as painting and drawing because it stimulates their interests, there is a vast amount of
students
 who do not enjoy, nor need
art
classes
 for their intended careers. For senior years
students
 who do not enjoy arts, it can be boring and uninspiring. Making
art
classes
 compulsory for these
students
 only makes them develop a negative attitude towards learning in schools. It has been proven in many research
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
studies that the best way to maintain high student engagement in
classes
 and in
school
 in general,
students
 must enjoy their
classes
 and feel like they need them for their future careers. By the
time
 most
students
 get to High
school
, they are mostly aware of what their interests and dislikes are, by not making
Art
classes
 mandatory,
students
 can spend more
time
 on subjects that matter more to them and their future careers.
For example
, a high
school
 student who intends to be a pilot can spend more
time
 practising and learning about important subjects like mathematics rather than being required to attend
art
classes
instead
.
To conclude
, I strongly agree that
Art
classes
 are not as important to every high
school
 student, and making them compulsory only takes away
time
 that could be used to teach other subjects that are more important and enjoyable to
students
.
Submitted by kelvinnseth on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: