In many parts of the world, children are given more freedom than in the past. Is this a possitive or a negetive development.

The world is changing and
as a result
, the rules and norms of society are experiencing changes when adults of today compare their own childhood with today's
children
, they notice that new generations have more
freedom
than they have. I believe
this
situation has advantages and disadvantages, but its advantages outweigh its disadvantages. When
children
have
freedom
, they are more likely to develop essential life skills
such
as making decisions solving problems and being
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
independent person.
In addition
, having
Freedom
gives
children
a chance to do whatever they want which leads to their talents will be discovered. To be more specific, it has been psychologically proven that
children
who are allowed to do their interest activities have a wide range of experience which makes them mature-minded and
this
fosters their self-confidence.
Therefore
I argue
freedom
can have positive effects on
children
's growth.
On the other hand
, despite having numerous benefits there are some drawbacks when
children
have
freedom
unrestrictedly. One potential disadvantage of unrestricted
freedom
is poor decision-making. In fact,
children
cannot distinguish between wrong and right, so parents should set boundaries for them.
For instance
, they are exposed to violence and immorality
such
as addiction and drugs.
Hence
,They should be protected by their parents and the government have to establish rules to guide and support them.
To conclude
, I hope the opinion that when
children
act freely they are prone to overcome obstacles that increase their growth.
Whereas
Correct word choice
This
show examples
this
Freedom
should be controlled and restricted to prevent harmful effects.
Submitted by mhshid on

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task response
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and provides relevant arguments both in favor and against the issue. However, make sure to directly address the question prompt in every paragraph and provide a balanced view of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical and clear structure, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the topic. Try to use more cohesive devices such as transition words and linking phrases to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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