In many parts of the world, children are given more freedom than in the past. Is this a possitive or a negetive development.
The world is changing and
as a result
, the rules and norms of society are experiencing changes when adults of today compare their own childhood with today's children
, they notice that new generations have more freedom
than they have. I believe this
situation has advantages and disadvantages, but its advantages outweigh its disadvantages.
When children
have freedom
, they are more likely to develop essential life skills such
as making decisions solving problems and being an
independent person.Correct article usage
apply
In addition
, having Freedom
gives children
a chance to do whatever they want which leads to their talents will be discovered. To be more specific, it has been psychologically proven that children
who are allowed to do their interest activities have a wide range of experience which makes them mature-minded and this
fosters their self-confidence. Therefore
I argue freedom
can have positive effects on children
's growth.
On the other hand
, despite having numerous benefits there are some drawbacks when children
have freedom
unrestrictedly. One potential disadvantage of unrestricted freedom
is poor decision-making. In fact, children
cannot distinguish between wrong and right, so parents should set boundaries for them. For instance
, they are exposed to violence and immorality such
as addiction and drugs. Hence
,They should be protected by their parents and the government have to establish rules to guide and support them.
To conclude
, I hope the opinion that when children
act freely they are prone to overcome obstacles that increase their growth. Whereas
Correct word choice
This
this
Freedom
should be controlled and restricted to prevent harmful effects.Submitted by mhshid on
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task response
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and provides relevant arguments both in favor and against the issue. However, make sure to directly address the question prompt in every paragraph and provide a balanced view of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical and clear structure, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the topic. Try to use more cohesive devices such as transition words and linking phrases to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of your essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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