Modern buildings appear in large numbers, but some people believe that we should build our buildings in traditional styles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, in the highly industrialized era, living standards have been enhanced considerably,
as well as
human rights are being paid close attention. Linking Words
However
, there still remains about whether we should build our buildings in traditional Linking Words
styles
or modern Use synonyms
styles
. In my opinion, I completely believe that building style depends on each person's personality.
Use synonyms
To begin
with, when the Linking Words
benefits
of modern Use synonyms
styles
are taken into consideration, we clearly see that modern Use synonyms
styles
resolve many outstanding issues nowadays. There is no doubt that the trend of utilization rate is growing Use synonyms
day
by Use synonyms
day
so Use synonyms
people
need to resolve Use synonyms
this
outstanding issue. Starting a modern building will resolve these problems. For more details, Linking Words
people
can set up skyscrapers or apartments with many floors meeting the need for human accommodation. Use synonyms
On the other hand
, building traditional houses requires a big acreage of land for Linking Words
people
can build. Use synonyms
Next,
in the highly industrialized era, the living standards increase Linking Words
day
by Use synonyms
day
so that Use synonyms
building
modern houses meet human requirements. For more details, it is well-equipped with modern technologies and these Verb problem
apply
benefits
will make human accommodation Use synonyms
become
more convenient, comfortable, …
Verb problem
apply
On the other hand
, when it comes to the Linking Words
benefits
of old buildings, we can recognize that Use synonyms
this
style has not only aesthetic Linking Words
values
but Use synonyms
also
cultural Linking Words
values
. First of all, begin with, the aesthetic Use synonyms
values
of historic buildings. We know that culture is defined by the way of life, especially the general customs and beliefs, of a particular group of Use synonyms
people
at a particular time. Use synonyms
Besides
that, culture includes not only Linking Words
styles
and food but Use synonyms
also
accommodation. Of course, the classic house has its beauty, and it is Linking Words
also
a symbol of each nation's culture. These Linking Words
values
have to Use synonyms
keep
through time because it is national identity.
Wrong verb form
be kept
In particular
, both Linking Words
styles
traditional and modern have their Use synonyms
benefits
so the building style depends on the personality and needs of each person.Use synonyms
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task achievement
You should aim to develop your points more thoroughly with specific examples and explanations. This will provide depth to your essay and make your arguments more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Your essay needs better logical transitions between paragraphs. Try to make the progression of ideas clearer with linking words or phrases.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences are a bit unclear or awkwardly structured, which can impact the reader's understanding. Focus on structuring your sentences more clearly and avoiding overly complex phrasing.
task achievement
Your essay covers both sides of the argument, acknowledging the benefits of both modern and traditional buildings, which is good for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps structure your essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example