IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by the government rather than private companies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#research #government #companies
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Some
people
 believe that private enterprise should be held responsible for conducting scientific
research
.
While
this
 may have minor benefits in the short term, I would argue that
this
 is outweighed by enormous disadvantages. On the one hand, one advantage is that private businesses sometimes respond more rapidly to demand than local authorities.
People
 who invest money in these companies are greedy to make the most of any business opportunity.
Thus
, huge amounts of money have always in available status for these corporations to carry out
research
 which might maximise profits.
For example
, the outbreak of an epidemic
such
 as coronavirus, presents a spectacular chance for the pharmaceutical industry. In the search for a cure, the first company developed a vaccine standing to make a vast fortune, whether governments buy the vaccine or
people
 have to purchase it themselves.
On the other hand
, there are significant benefits if governments directly lead
to
Change preposition
apply
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the conduct of scientific
research
 for the well-being of their citizens.
Firstly
, they must provide funding for university departments to implement
research
according to
 public needs. Advances in technology and knowledge to achieve sustainable development would be used to benefit
people
, not investors.
Thus
,
research
 into areas like preventive medicine or alleviating environmental problems, despite of unprofitable, is essential.
Secondly
, because competition among companies is eliminated, the sharing of knowledge through international cooperation in the scientific community becomes the norm. In conclusion,
although
 there is one benefit when private companies control scientific
research
, governments bring the results more effective in managing
this
 section of
research
.
Submitted by aim7lva on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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