IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of news Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

#people #media #touch #news #outweigh
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It is quite popular to see that
people
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 have changed
the
Change the word
their
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 way of communication with the advancement in technology, and
ready
Add a missing verb
are ready
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 to explore various
news
Use synonyms
 from the different
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of
world
Add an article
the world
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.
While
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 I genuinely accept that
this
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 statement
have
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has
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few
Correct article usage
a few
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 considerable drawbacks, I still claim that it is
constructive
Correct article usage
a constructive
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 approach
due to
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 several benefits. There are two main disadvantages of
this
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 approach, and the prominent one is
lack
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the lack
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 of accurate resources.
This
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 is because when
people
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 acquire from
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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, and
people
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 are more likely to have
a wrong information
Remove the article
wrong information
a piece of wrong information
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 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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social media. To illustrate, turkey
news
Use synonyms
channel
Fix the agreement mistake
channels
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 have conveyed
the
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apply
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fake data about the
people
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 who have actually died during the
earth quake
Correct your spelling
earthquake
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.
Apart from
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this
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, media apps are not that effective to know anyone’s emotions about how and what they feel.
This
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 is due
the
Change preposition
to the
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 reason about lack of emotions
while
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people
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 talk over the phones and use other apps
such
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 as
facebook
Correct your spelling
Facebook
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, Snapchat and many more.
However
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, I would argue that the demerits of acquiring information from
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the internet
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internet
Correct your spelling
Internet
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 are outweighed by the merits.
Firstly
Linking Words
, everyone can talk to each other from every part of the globe with the help of
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Correct your spelling
Internet
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.
This
Linking Words
 is owing to the factor that there are some apps that are helping
people
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 to connect with
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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 on video and audio
call
Fix the agreement mistake
calls
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.
For instance
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,
facebook
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Facebook
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 is an app that can add multiple
people
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, and
it
Change the pronoun
its
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watch
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watches
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around
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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near and dear ones about where and how they are.
Secondly
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, in terms of
news
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,
people
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 are not
over- dependent
Correct your spelling
over-dependent
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 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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newspapers and magazines since they can
simple
Replace the word
simply
show examples
 use their fingers on the
touch pad
Correct your spelling
touchpad
show examples
 to know anything happening. In conclusion, It seems to me that the potential upsides of using
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
the internet
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 in order to
know
Add the particle
toknow
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 connect to
people
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and
getting
Wrong verb form
get
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news
Use synonyms
 with social media are more significant than the possible dangers.
Submitted by Navneet Dhand on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Instant communication
  • Geographical separation
  • Vital sources
  • Global events
  • Networking opportunities
  • Interpersonal relationships
  • Digital interactions
  • Misinformation
  • Misiformed public opinions
  • Endanger
  • Excessive use
  • Addiction
  • Mental health
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Loneliness
What to do next:
Look at other essays: