Some people belive that children should spend all of their free time with their families . Others belive that is unncenssary or even negative. Discuss the possible arguments on both sides, and say which side you personally support.
Some argue that leisure
time
habits of children
should spent
with their families in different ways, Change the verb form
be spent
spend
while
others believe that this
is contributes
to Change the verb form
is contributing
a
negative implications.I share Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
this
view that toddlers shouldOn
the one hand, Correct your spelling
should
technologies
can be a source of distraction for Fix the agreement mistake
technology
children
, because when youngsters use electronic devices in their free time
without family members, resulting in they can be occur
even Change the verb form
occur
the
crime which is increasingly common among teenagers.Correct article usage
apply
Futhermore
, it can distract them from studies and other important commitments Correct your spelling
Furthermore
such
as sports, this
is because they want to live liberty as they want without families and it can lead to Add an article
the low
a low
low value
Add a hyphen
low-value
of
lifestyle. rely on their families in Change preposition
apply
leisure
Correct pronoun usage
their leisure
time
.On the other
hand
teens should spend their leisure Add a comma
,hand
time
for
parents or siblings,Change preposition
with
this
is because when children
occupied
with important Add a missing verb
are occupied
task
, they are deprived of chances for the best moments of happiness Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
such
as birthday parties or wedding days. It is also
worth meantioning
that parents should control their Correct your spelling
mentioning
children
tasks and Change noun form
children's
homeworks
. Having bolstered their cognitive abilities from a young age, Correct your spelling
homework
children
are likely to perform well at school which is essential for their future success.To sum up
, although
this
trend provides a number of facilities, I am more inclined to say that parents should control their children
free Change noun form
children's
time
.Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion